Moving House and all that stuff

#Moving House

Guess what?                                               Image from MotivatedPhotos.com

Moving House

“Move to a new country and you quickly see that visiting a place as a tourist, and actually moving there for good, are two very different things.”  ― Tahir Shah, Travels With Myself 

There’s something about moving house. New energy, new location, new start – another beginning. Yes, that’s all true. But so is the disruption, dislocation, disturbance and the dismay when the removalists, the phone or power company doesn’t keep their many promises to make this ‘the smoothest operation ever…..!”

And that’s where we are – moving house! For the next couple of weeks, we may, or may not get a chance to get more blogs out, but rest assured, after we settle into the new home, there is so much waiting for you. For example, the next couple of blogs – titles coming are “Empowerment Lessons from an Oilcan” and “Where to start”. Powerful, fundamental stuff, with a great story embedded around the lessons I found along the way.

Just like tonight. Moving house.

#Moving house

Oh no! I love doing that!              Image from motleynews.net

How do you keep your head together when the plan is to disrupt, dissemble and generally pull apart every part of your life as it is, box it and reassemble many miles and hours later?

There’s a way that is working for me. I work from the Life Change 90 program, and the organisation it provides in my day is handling everything for me. I put in my challenges and goals for the day each morning, I get my pep talk and off I go. The progress has been amazing – we are actually some days ahead of schedule! Then in the evening, I sit for a few minutes, tick off what we have achieved, tally the results, write a few words about the day and its progress and enable tomorrow’s plan and schedule to come through. I note that and I’m outta here – those few minutes morning and night have made the rest of my day so smooth!

One of the things I am working on is a mild revision of the Life Change 90 program. Correcting a few typo errors in the original text, which somehow I missed before it went to the producer, and adding a few details in a few sections to make it even simpler to understand and live with. By the end of the month, I expect the new version will be uploaded and available to you. If you are one of the folks who take a copy in the meantime, you’ll have the new one emailed to you, as soon as we get it back to us! No charge!

If you’d like this level of support in your day, whether you are moving house, or moving mountains, this is where to get it. Click here and download the best friend you could wish for online! If you know someone else who needs something like this, send it to them and share the love. After all, everyone needs a friend!

Til next time, fair winds and full sails. And removalist trucks!

Ray

“Some part of me can’t wait to see what life’s going to come up with next! Anticipation without the usual anxiety. And underneath it all is the feeling that we both belong here, just as we are, right now.” ― Alexander Shulgin

#Moving house

OK, we are ready!              Image from blog.gamos.gr

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Driven or Drifting

#Driven or drifting

Driven? Image from Forza Motorsport

#Driven or drifting

Drifting? Image from duotraq.com

Driven or Drifting

“Freedom lies in being bold.” ― Robert Frost

We are moving house at the moment. It’s a time of frantic activity, packing, planning and preparing for a major change. And it’s OK! We are enjoying the activity because we know there are great things to look forward to. The knowing is driving us forward to the new experiences we will share there.

After we arrive at our new home, we’ll unpack, get ourselves settled in, and then relax.

From time to time in everyone’s life, we are driven by a need, compulsion, goal or ambition, or fear. At other times, when none of these stimulants are present, we can find ourselves drifting, just cruising. Both are OK. As long as we are aware of what state we are in, and are happy with it.

It’s when we are unconsciously in a state of either being #driven or drifting that we can get into trouble.

Can you be unconsciously driven?

Yes. Consider the workaholic. Ask them why they work 18 hours a day and they may not know, or just say there’s “a lot on at the moment” and keep working. However, it’s a subconscious compulsion, driven by who knows what. It’s not something they can control; it actually controls them, and in the process, may ruin lives, relationships, health, businesses and more.

#Driven or drifting

Choices… Workaholic! Image from rockinmarriage.com

Workaholics are not the only ones driven by unconscious compulsions and drivers. There are all the other ‘holics’ as well, plus those obsessed with anything that prevents them from enjoying the ebb and flow of normal life. Collectors are a great example. It’s wonderful to collect items of special significance to you. However, when it takes over your life, costs you financially, emotionally, ruins relationships, health and families, even your best friend will suggest that your obsession with collecting bottle tops has taken over – your life is no longer your own!

Can you be unconsciously drifting?

Yes, again. When the rush dies down, it’s nice to sit on the couch and watch a movie, or read a book. It’s a natural cycle of life that we rest and recharge the batteries before the next big push. But what if there is no ‘next big push’?

The danger of being too comfortable.

When life is cruising like this, each day is a routine where nothing challenging happens, perhaps beyond some traffic, your team losing or the local store being out of your favourite item, the danger is that your mind, and sometimes your muscles, atrophy. “Use it or lose it” is the old saying, and there’s a lot of value in it.

#Driven or drifting

Opportunity passing by. Image from wilywalnut.com

We know that one of the greatest defences against mental illnesses such as Parkinson’s or dementia, for example, is to actively challenge your mind. Crossword puzzles, electronic games and other specific mental activities force the mind and the brain to work and create fresh new neural pathways, that somehow manage to stave off the onset of these degenerative mental illnesses for years, even when there is a genetic predisposition towards them. Being lazy has a terrible price to pay, and it’s not a direct cost. It’s the cost of what you can lose, both in opportunity and function, by not getting out and taking part in life, contributing and being challenged by life. Sometimes the greatest losses are only realised later, when you learn that an incredible opportunity passed by, while you were sitting on your couch!

Balancing life’s driven and drifting cycles.

Human beings need goals, as something to aim for, a purpose, something to identify with and to look forward to.  As a species, we need something to look forward to, something to give us some brightness of the future, some hope. Even the worst day or mood can be lifted when the person is shown a little something they value, something to look forward to. At best, the goals we set can be empowering, motivating and inspirational, as they should be. Whether it’s a family goal, or the love of family that motivates and drives us, or whether it’s a goal to be the greatest in the world at something, it doesn’t matter. As long as it moves us, and stops the atrophy.

However, to balance it, we all need some downtime. Our bodies have a “circadian rhythm”, a 24 hour cycle in which we are programmed for a period of driven activity, and a period when the program is for the body to sleep, to rest and recuperate. Driven or drifting throughout a 24 hour period. Genetically, this is how we are programmed.

Mentally, it’s similar with being driven or drifting, but with different time frames. If we have an interest in something, we are inspired and motivated by it, but when we complete that challenge, the drive to understand and master it, that drive often dissipates and we can move on from it. Depending on what it is, that cycle can last from moments to days, months or years. At the end of that cycle, the mind needs to tune out, before tuning in again on something new.

Even the most satisfying career or job needs us to take a break, to maintain our freshness and enthusiasm. We take annual holidays – at least, we should! Most employment contracts specify some time off each year, but it’s great also to take breaks on weekends, to escape from the rush, the drive and to ‘smell the roses’, appreciating our family and friends and life other than the career or driving force.

#Driven or drifting

Moving house? Image from removalists.com

Just like my wife and I will rest after we move into our lovely new home, and unpack the boxes containing our lives. We will rest, recover and start the forward planning process again, from a new base.

Are you locked into a rhythm of being too much driven or drifting?

How do you know? And what can you do about it?

The first step towards regaining control of life, whether you are driven or drifting, is to be aware of what you are doing. Consciousness is not something everyone is good at! How many times have you driven to work, and only realised when you arrived that you had no memory of the trip? Or the train or bus ride? When we develop a routine of checking in on awareness each day, we regain consciousness of our activities, our thoughts and our direction, and only then can we begin to take back control of our lives. That provides the opportunity to decide on our driven or drifting schedules, when to set and work on our inspirational goals, and when to take time to relax, recuperate and drift along with the flow of life.

The next step is to consciously assess where we are in life compared to where we want to be, and decide on how to make up the differences. Setting goals to achieve the necessary steps to catch up to where we decided perhaps in our youth, where we wanted to be by each certain age. Life throws us curve balls, and only when we become conscious do we realise that we haven’t achieved everything we wanted, or we are not feeling the satisfaction from it that we expected.

That’s when a program to raise awareness and provide the discipline and skills you need to get back on track can be such a powerful aid to progressing towards the life you dreamed of. That program would inspire you each morning, refresh your goals for you and point out the action steps you needed to take that day, provide you with a ‘to do’ list of other life matters for the day, and close your day with a cheer, congratulating you on your achievements, and inspiring you to look forward to tomorrow. You can have that program; it’s HERE! To find out more about it, click this link and picture yourself moving forward into the life you dreamed of, only this time, with the guidebook you always knew was somewhere to be had. Now you can have it!

If you feel inspired to take the next step now, perhaps others will too. Please forward this article and share it with others who you feel want more from their lives too. Change their lives, as well as your own.

Til next time, fair winds and full sails!

Ray Jamieson

When you take charge of your life, there is no longer need to ask permission of other people or society at large. When you ask permission, you give someone veto power over your life.   Abert F. Geoffrey

#Driven or drifting

I’m my own man! Image from super-trainer.com

Where are you searching?

#Whereareyousearching

An obvious place to search…!
Image from treasury.gov.au

Where are you searching?

“Make sure that the beer – four pints a week – goes to the troops under fire before any of the parties in the rear get a drop.” — Winston Churchill to his Secretary of War, 1944

It was a dark and stormy evening.  The very drunk man weaved his way down the footpath, crossed the road and into the car park.  He thought he could see his car, over on the far side, across the garden beds.  As he stumbled through the flowers, he pulled his car keys out, and dropped them.  He stopped, looked around but as it was dark, he couldn’t see them amongst the flower beds.  He turned around.

Some time later, another, quite sober man walked down the same footpath and saw our very drunk friend on his hands and knees under a street light, obviously searching for something.  He stopped and asked if he was OK, and had he lost something.

“Yesh… (belch) …!  I dropped my (hiccup) car keys an I yam trying to find them!”

“Can I help you search?” asked our Good Samaritan?

“That would be very mush apprec.. apprec… apprec… Thank you!”

After some time, it was obvious the keys were not there.  The Good Samaritan asked:  “Where were you when you dropped them?”

“I wuz in the flower garden over there in the car park an they dropped right out of my fingers…!”

“Then why are you looking here, and not over there where you dropped them?”

“Silly..  There’s no light over there!”

We can laugh at this funny story, but is there a real life parallel here?

#Where are you searching for what you want from life?

#Where are you searching

I went to the woods to seek enlightenment
Image from flickr.com

Are you looking where it’s easy to see, where it’s easy to be, rather than where “it” actually is?

Are you looking “out there” in things, or other people for the answers you need from a lot closer to home?  It’s easy to bury ourselves in work, or distract ourselves with toys, technology, titillation or temptation.  However, there comes a time when we realise that if we REALLY want to achieve what it is we said we wanted so long ago, that we have to get real, and go looking for it in the right place.  So where are you searching?

#Where are you searching

Searching for answers in toys
Image from thisnext.com

The right place may not always be in the light. The right place may not be easy.  The right place may be uncomfortable for a while.  The right place might be hard.

But being in the wrong place is eventually a lot harder and darker and less fun than looking in the right place!

Where are you searching?

Why are you searching there, rather than where it is?

Are you searching in the wrong place because you don’t know where to look?  Or because you are afraid you’ll find it?  That’s the scary one – fear of success can really mess up your party, and your life!  Getting over this is actually not as hard as you think, once you realise it might be a problem for you.  Read on…

“The true value of a human being can be found in the degree to which he has attained liberation from the self.” ― Albert Einstein

How do you know where to search?

The answers are usually within.  Within us.  Starting with the will to be honest with ourselves, and get clear with what we truly want.  And why we want it.  Once we know what we want and have a powerful reason why, the how will soon appear.  It always does.  Internal motivation works that way.

Whether the how, the method, strategy or direction to what you want is through a person, an opportunity, knowledge or whatever, once you have clarity and the motivation to pursue it, you will find a way.  However, that’s the hard way….

Many years ago, Thomas Alva Edison, working in conjunction with a team of researchers at his Menlo Park studio, invented the first practical light bulb which was great for looking in dark places.

You may not need a light bulb in your search, but you may need assistance to find what you are looking for, both in the early stages when you seek clarity and empowerment, and later, when you need a goalsetting strategy and a support team.  Where are you searching now?  Perhaps there is an easier way.

It’s all here for you.  We have a program that can change your life, pretty much as quickly as you choose to plug into it!  Your search must start with yourself, and that is where the program starts, creating a safe and supportive environment around you, teaching you how to get clarity on what you really want from life, enhancing your powers of awareness and observation, teaching you life strategies and consolidating your lessons every evening.  Your goalsetting activities are recorded daily, habits you want to break or create are recorded so you can see your progress with them.  Advanced life skills are bundled in so that you can change your life, in the next 90 days!  Permanent, positive change.  Is that what you were searching for?  Click here to discover it now!

If you feel this post has helped you to stop searching under the lamp-post and start looking where your goals are, then please, share this blog, pass it on to your friends and associates.  Perhaps you could be the one who helps them to start looking for what they want from life in the right place too!

Til next time, fair winds and full sails!

Ray Jamieson

“Do not look for happiness outside yourself. The awakened seek happiness inside.”
Peter Deunov

Please also refer to my other posts on #Empowerment, to assist you with your specific challenge.

Integrity, Spirituality and Empowerment

Financial Empowerment

Empowerment for Men

Empowerment for Women

Personal Empowerment

Empowered by love

#Where are you searching?

I FOUND IT!
Image from goinflippincrazy.com

Empowered by my Failures

#failures

Oprah Winfrey, a failure?
Image from erictippetts.com

Empowered by Failures

I have made mistakes.  I have had failures.  Lots of failures.  Sometimes, I did the same thing again and it still failed!  A bit like the guy betting on replays of the Melbourne Cup, just in case the favourite racehorse got up this time.  Let’s face it, some people take a while to “get it” and I’m probably one of those who need to do it the hard way.  But the hard way sometimes really cements the lessons of your #failures for you.

How was I empowered by my failures?

Let’s look at some of my failures.  I had a marriage breakdown.  Why?  Because I was busy being a guy, a provider and a worker, but not very good at being a communicator, husband or father.

What did I learn from my failures?

There are some things that need to be put first in life, and family is one of them.  Sure, I needed to provide for my family, but I needed to make sure their happiness was in place before I tried to buy “stuff” for them.  What they wanted was my love, my company, my attention, not my “stuff”!

Another of my failures was in not doing enough homework on some things before jumping in.  I was impulsive and would make decisions on the spot, because I thought that fast decision-making and “being decisive” was the way to be.  It is, but only if you know what you are talking about and making decisions on.  For everything else, do the homework!

What did I learn from my failures?

Take time.  Just like sand takes time to filter through an hourglass, so does information take time to filter through my mind.  Give it the time it needs to process the information and the homework on the question at hand, and only then, make the decision.

Many people look to successful people for how to become successful.  The wise people also look at what the #failures have to teach us.  The light bulb wasn’t invented at the first experiment.  Every failure was documented and used as a stepping stone til finally, success came, after all those failures, those learning experiences.

#failures

Thomas Edison – a prolific failure!
Image from madeinindia.net.au

There is so much that I have learnt from failures over the years.  What I learnt when sitting back, many years later, was that I had developed a process that while ever I used it, worked for me, and made life good.  When I applied my life to a certain set of principles, took notice of what my intuition was telling me and acted from my heart with integrity, life was good.

I distilled this process over time, before I began to teach it.  The first programs went to corporations and they paid huge sums of money for it.  As I taught it, I also learnt more about it and when it evolved into my first public program, “The Executive Mastermind Program”, it was an amazing program.  I delivered it in four weekend workshops over a year, with huge amounts of support in between the workshops.  That was because for information to be retained, the mind and body need to continually integrate it and that was how we did it.  Accelerated Learning was the technique, the strategy that became famous for teaching people a new language in a few days…  I harnessed Accelerated Learning and used some NLP strategies and techniques to anchor it, and the lives of many people changed.

It was limited though and I over stretched myself, trying to do too much for too many.  Another of my failures.  I pulled back and went a little off course, veering off into financial planning for a time but that was also a mistake.

What did I learn from my failures?

Stay true.  Listen to my heart and stay in integrity.  Hmmm.  Sounds familiar.  So I’m back on track now, writing and teaching, and working with my program.  It works every time.

You can have it too.  It’s a program that has a number of amazing features.  When you look at these features, you can see why it would keep me, or you, on track:

  • A daily personal empowerment program, a page of motivational pep talk on a self development topic of value.  Each month for 3 months, the topic comes back in a little more depth to enhance and reinforce the learning, teaching me all about what is important for me and how to be better at being me.
  • A priority to-do list with check boxes for completion status
  • A problem solving program and process
  • A goal setting program, with action steps towards my #1 goal each day
  • A gratitude journal, to remind me of the wonderful things I already have in my life
  • A daily affirmation, to lock in what I desire from my life
  • Learning how to be aware of what I learnt from what happened to me today
  • Recording a ‘high’ and ‘low’ point of the day, to make me aware of mood shifts and my attitude and behaviour when things in my day change
  • A cashflow program, for recording my earning and spending and increasing my financial habits awareness
  • A comment on my major achievement for the day, a little celebration
  • A journal section with topics to discuss and explore, as well as my own personal journaling on thoughts about my day.

A few minutes morning and evening is all this program takes, but when I developed the first crude version of it back in 1992, it turned my then miserable life around on a sixpence!

What did I learn from my success program, inspired by my failures?

Awareness of my personality.  I learnt that there was a lot more going on around me than I thought.  Looking at my mood shifts, I realised I was jumping between sub-personalities!  When I mastered that, it was a game-changer.

Awareness of others.  As my awareness increased, I learnt to listen to and observe others more closely.  I was no longer swept along in the tide of humanity; I was an observer, choosing with discernment where I wanted to be.

Awareness of my finances.  No more reaching for my wallet to realise I’d already spent that note I thought I had.  I became conscious of my spending and many other habits that previously I had left on auto-pilot.

Awareness of my lessons.  What good is an experience if it doesn’t teach us something?  Each day I’d record what I learnt from my successes and failures and found I was sitting on a wealth of valuable experiences, that I had been glossing over and forgetting.

Awareness of my communications.  Failure in communications is ripping the world apart and it was tearing mine apart too.  When I became aware of the power of my words, what I said to me internally, and what I said to others, I took back control of my life.

Awareness of my intuition.  Perhaps my greatest failures were from not listening to my intuition screaming at me at critical moments.  Learning to discern between negative mind chatter and genuine intuitive processing and inspiration has possibly been the most powerful of all for me.  Intuition taps into a global network of incredible resources, information and a wealth of ideas and inspiration that a single human mind could not process, but it can access it!  The greatest minds have acknowledged it – Einstein and the American Founding Fathers to name a few.  Allowing the messages to come to me and recognising their value has been phenomenal – and averted many failures too!

How can you gain empowerment from my failures?

This program is available to you also.  The work of putting it together has been done.  Now you can download it and plug it into your life.  In a few minutes, morning and evening, you can start to change your life too!  I found that over a 90 day period, I experienced life changing results from the habits I broke or changed and the new habits I formed and integrated into my life.  Over those 90 days, my awareness exploded; I found myself observing events, nuances and inferences from situations that had previously slipped by me.  It was like looking at my life as a black and white pencil sketch, then suddenly making it a full colour photo, with the richness of the new observations filling in the colours.

#failures

Open up to a whole new world!
Image from wonderwoman.intoday.in

Is 90 days of this life change program all that is necessary?

If some is good, maybe more is better.  Why does a butcher sharpen his knives continually?  Because he needs to have them sharp all the time.  Just as our minds and our intuition need to be continually honed to work best, I find that by continuing with my life change program each day, I am both continually refreshing myself with these habits, changing any that do not serve me, and keeping focussed on my important goals.

How can you have this program in your life?

It’s as simple as downloading it here, and starting on it straight away.  The daily PEP talk tutorials are a great start to the day, and having your goal action steps in front of you first thing in the morning is an inspiration.  But nothing quite like the feeling of coming in at night and ticking off your achievements.

Download it here now and make a start.  Learn from my failures.  Don’t let this be one of yours.  Change your life from today.

If you have gained a benefit from learning about my failures and how I turned them to my benefit, please reblog and share this post with your friends, family and associates.  Share your journey with them.  Everyone deserves an opportunity to turn their failures and mistakes into golden opportunities and that’s what this is!  Pay it forward!

Til next time, fair winds and full sails.

Ray Jamieson

Please also refer to my other posts on Empowerment:

Integrity, Spirituality and Empowerment

Empowerment through Emotional Intelligence

Financial Empowerment

Empowerment

Empowerment for Men

Empowerment for Women

Empowerment for Teens

Empowerment for Children

Personal Empowerment

What would an empowered man do?

Empowered by love

Personal Empowerment

Personal Empowerment

Personal Empowerment – starting young!
Image from http://www.huffingtonpost.com

Personal Empowerment.

asinha97
You are responsible for your life. So why expect something to happen for motivation. Self motivation is biggest drive for self empowerment. Anil Sinha

I recently sat with a man who had asked me to write his biography, his journey from weighing 350 pounds (160 kilograms) back to 200 pounds (90 kg).  After he told me his story, I had a question for him.  First, here is his story, briefly.

He had told me that as he grew fatter, just from being a glutton and careless, he grew too big to do his ceiling insulation batt business – he couldn’t fit through the manholes into the ceiling cavity, so he sold that business and bought a security patrol business.  Then he couldn’t get in and out of the patrol cars because of his rapidly expanding girth, so he sold that business too.  Eventually he began selling real estate in a city office because all he had to do was stand (or sit) near the front door where people would walk by, and he could talk to them.

Personal Empowerment

Something wrong with this picture
Image from nypost.com

However, the life changing chain of events for him began with the bicycle shop next door.  Sometimes he’d stand at his front door and chat to the owner of the bicycle shop, a former triathlete champion, and one day he asked him if he could try riding a bike, as he thought he might like to lose some weight.  Just making conversation.  The reply was that he didn’t stock a bike that would hold his weight!

Then he needed to run to the back of his shop again to the toilet, for the fifth time that hour, and the bicycle shop owner told him he needed to get ‘that’ checked out.  He already knew what his problem was.  The doctor told him after a few short minutes “You have chronic diabetes caused by your eating habits.  If you don’t lose 100 pounds this year, you won’t see next year!”  It scared him; he said those words felt like machine gun fire into his chest!

My question to him was: “If that doctor had not threatened you with your own death, at what point would you have decided you were overweight and needed to do something about it?”

His answer?  “I don’t know.  I never considered it!  I don’t know what it would have taken to have that amount of personal empowerment, to recognise my problem and deal with it!”

Personal empowerment is not a big deal.

Personal Empowerment

A whale of a time!
Image from selfimprovementdevelopment.com

My definition for personal empowerment is the willingness to honestly see yourself as you are, and to commit to making any changes you feel are necessary for your wellbeing, on any level, physical, mental, emotional or spiritual.

That just means that if you know you are not fit, you decide to change that and you do what you need to do, to become more fit.  If you have bad breath, you brush your teeth.  If someone tells you that your breath is bad, you don’t abuse them for being rude to you; you thank them for being honest with you and then you brush your teeth.

Being less than you can be, less than your human potential is a crime against yourself.  That doesn’t mean that you need to be training to be fit enough to run the next marathon.  It doesn’t mean you need to immediately begin to diet, or take any other radical steps.  It has nothing to do with vanity, and everything to do with your personal pride.  Look honestly at yourself. Ask yourself if you are the person you always wanted to be. If you can see how you can become closer to that ideal, then you need the strength to commit to making the changes that will get you there.

OK, I hear some howls of protest!  Personal empowerment?  I’m suffering from a chronic illness, I can’t do that!  I was in a car accident and my injuries won’t allow that!  I am overweight because I have a medical condition and the drugs affect me!

Relax.  The question is; are you being all you can be?  If you are ill, then you are ill and that will place limitations on you physically.  But how is your heart?  How is your spirit?  How is your mind?

Personal empowerment will take you from where you are in your life, to where you could be.  It’s not about being fitter, faster, smarter or better than anyone else, just being the best YOU that you could be.  Sometimes, personal empowerment is just being the best parent you can be, so that you can be an empowered parent for your children.  What this world needs probably most of all, is empowered people, who can be empowered parents, so that the next generation who are our children now can take over this world and continue to make it better and fix the mistakes we have made in getting it to them.

Personal empowerment is worth it.

But how do you get personal empowerment?

Personal Empowerment

It’s the little things that count!
Image from mylifeismymessage.org

It’s easy.  Baby steps each day.  It’s not a massive shift, it’s just a few little success habits to get into each day, and then continue to do them every day!  Not hard at all.  You already have a number of habits right now, perhaps some that don’t serve you that you could replace, others that you definitely want to maintain.  Like brushing your teeth.  But add some affirmations and goalsetting to that.  Perhaps doing a few minutes reading of something positive each morning and evening – just a few minutes.  Perhaps setting priorities for your day, specific things that will actually advance you a little closer to your goals.  Perhaps at the end of the day, doing a review and seeing what you achieved, what you learned, what you felt, and checking off what you actually did.  If you started a new habit, check off that you did it, or didn’t – make yourself accountable.

Get into success habits.  Start feeling a sense of achievement for the little things, so that when the big things come up and real personal empowerment is needed to face those challenges, you have already been practising, you have the success habits in place, all you are doing is changing the goal……!  See?  Simple.

That is personal empowerment.  A program with all of this exists now for you to slip into your daily routine; you can get it here.  A few minutes morning and evening and it is done.

The bonus is that it teaches you lots of other cool strategies as well, such as communication skills, financial success tips, stress management and health tips, mental strategies, conflict resolution, goal setting and a whole heap more over the 90 days of the program.  That’s the few minutes of positive and empowered reading material, a couple of hundred words a day to get you on track with life changing strategies in every area of your life.  Personal empowerment was never so easy!  Start your personal empowerment program now!

If you feel this article has empowered and benefited you and you feel it could benefit the personal empowerment of other folks you know, please reblog it, share it with your friends and associates.  It might be the day you changed someone’s life for the better!

Til next time, fair winds and full sails,

Ray Jamieson

Be ambitious towards your own personal enhancement.  Steve Mariboli

Please also refer to my other posts on Empowerment:

Financial Empowerment

Empowerment

Empowerment for Men

Empowerment for Women

Empowerment for Teens

Empowerment for Children

Personal Empowerment

What would an empowered man do?

EMPOWERMENT

Empowerment

“If there was one wish I had for you, one gift I could give you, it would be empowerment.  People without empowerment act from a survival basis and must do whatever they can or need to do, just to survive.  Empowered people act from their sense of what is right and wrong, their conscience guides them.  Empowered people don’t get up in the morning wondering what they can do wrong or to hurt others; they look for ways to make the world better.  I wish for you #empowerment.”

Excerpt from Executive Mastermind Program 2001

#Empowerment

Break free to Empowerment
Image from theindianuprising.blogspot.com

The daily news shows graphic images of people living in fear, striving for survival, hungry for love, affection, even just acknowledgement.  These are people who are not empowered.

Less often we see images of people walking purposefully, striding out, or relaxed with their families, feeling confident, happy, secure.  There are two reasons for that:  Firstly, it’s not graphic news and it doesn’t sell newspapers or TV airspace time, but secondly and sadly, there are fewer people living a life of empowerment.

If empowerment was a choice, why don’t people take it?

There are probably three main reasons.

  1. Power-hungry bullies, including governments, corporations and others in positions of power and authority find it easier to govern or rule people who fear them and don’t know that they can choose a better life.
  2. Ignorance.  They have been conditioned to living in fear or survival mode for so long, it’s not part of their reality and they neither know nor understand it, nor do they believe there is anything in life for them other than what they have.
  3. Challenging life situations, where people have been born into or acquired a challenging situation such as poverty, chronic illness or accident causing a massive life and/or health change or other similar circumstances.

Let’s look at these reasons, and their contradictions.

#Empowerment

Under pressure from big brother!
from gscblog.typepad.com

Power Hungry Bullies oppressing people over whom they have a measure of control.  It is far easier to herd sheep from horseback than say, a pride of lions.  Why is that?  Because the lion is not afraid of a man on horseback!  If you are in the ‘herding people’ business, it pays you to have them frightened of you!  It’s that simple.

The ‘people herders’ are governments, large corporations (think Monsanto, Halliburton, General Dynamics, etc.), employers where there are dictatorial bosses, and even within families, a spouse might dominate their partner.  These bullies think they need to exert massive and overwhelming power to get what they want.  However, in most cases, they are coming from a level of fear and insecurity also, where their fear is that if their “subjects” become empowered, they will rise up and overthrow them!

The contradiction is that empowered people don’t really need to overthrow anyone else.  They feel confident and secure within themselves and are already in control of their lives.

#Empowerment

MONOPOLY ON FOOD SEEDS
Image from worldtruth.tv

Ignorance and conditioning.  These are the people held down by their conditioning and the bullies they ‘live under’.  Conditioning is one thing – education and positive experiences can, in time, overcome conditioning and in the right circumstances, enable empowerment.  Getting out from under a genuine bully is another – their fear of losing control can be extreme and their actions to retain control can be extreme also.

Awareness is the first step for those living under oppression.  Only once the awareness is there, the long trek out can begin.

Challenging life situations.  Let’s break these down into poverty and poor birthright, and accident and illness causing an acquired chronic situation.

Poverty in a developed country may be an income of $200 per week.  It may be as high as $500 per week, depending on the location and circumstances.  However, in some developing countries, $200 per year is a fortune, it is fabulous wealth!  Poverty is relative to the location and circumstances, but just as real in any circumstances.  Where there is education, there is a way forward.  Where there is no education, intervention is often necessary.

#Empowerment

Poverty from birthright, caste and cultural status
Image from secularpakistan.wordpress.com

Poor birthright can mean a person born into a caste, race or class situation where they are deemed to have no rights.  Many developing nations have this problem.  The crazy thing is that when a person of poor caste migrates or is relocated to another country, often this condition vanishes because that caste or class distinction is not recognised outside their own culture.  Education can be the starting point for this transition.

Chronic illness and acquired injuries forcing changed life circumstances.  An insect bite can change your life.  A momentary lapse of concentration while driving can do it too.  A sporting injury can take a person from Olympic glory to total dependency on a full-time nurse.  Life can change without warning.  There is no easy way back from this and lives can change forever.

However, empowerment does not rely on wealth, power or influence.  Empowerment is firstly, a state of mind, preceding the physical changes that can occur because of it.

Look at Nelson Mandela’s example:  Imprisoned by a brutal regime for 27 years, he emerged as a man ready to be president of a nation emerging from possibly the darkest period in its history.  When he passed away recently, he was revered as a leader, an example of a man who empowered and united a nation by his example.  How could that happen?

The Empowerment Tone Scale

In the EMPOWERMENT TONE SCALE image, the TONE SCALE is shown on the left of the image, with the emotions listed in ascending order beside the scores.  Empowerment is shown as an emotional state, a state of mind on the image, at the top end of the scale.

The broad blue vertical arrow shows the emotional range in which most people live.  You can verify this by walking on any street and noting how many people are smiling from the inside, happy and carefree, and how many are walking with heavy hearts and steps.

#Empowerment

Empowerment Tone Scale

The challenge of empowerment becomes one of understanding how to raise the emotional state of a person from their state of concern to where they take an interest in the world around them, and are no longer concerned with fear or survival.  There is a simple, standard starting point.

Ask the question of yourself:  HOW CAN I….?

What this simple question does is propel your mind from wherever on the tone scale it is, up into the region of creativity, as your mind automatically tries to answer the question.  Eventually, your mind starts to live up in that area of the tone scale, as you repeatedly bounce it from down where you asked the question, to where you want it to be.

However, note that between wherever you are on the tone scale, and where you want to be, you need to traverse, and experience all the other emotions on your journey to empowerment.  If you have been living in a state of ‘covert hostility’ for example, you will need to pass through and manage anger and pain and the other emotions on your way up.

At first, it will frustrate you and anger you, but perhaps that is just part of the journey.  Along the way you will experience many emotions and soon understand that you travel up and down this emotional tone scale many times daily.  However, you will soon find that by understanding it, being conscious of it and working with it, you will learn to live in the conscious, empowered part of it.

How can you train yourself and your mind for Empowerment?

#Empowerment

A little intervention to get started!
Image from weheartit.com

Empowerment must be from within you, but intervention and education is usually needed to spark the fires of creativity and imagination alight.  Once the inspiration for and understanding of the principles of empowerment are held, it’s up to each person then to continue the empowerment journey.  A supportive environment is preferable and will speed the process.  If that is not where you live, then you need to create that through the empowerment process you use.

The most effective way is to take on a program that sets out an empowerment routine for you each day.  A routine that sees you establish small, achievable goals daily, for you to congratulate yourself on their achievement each evening.  A program that gives you an affirmation each morning to carry you through.  A program that teaches you awareness and an understanding of what really goes on in your life, your heart, mind and soul as you make your way through your day.

This all happens, regardless of whether you are aware of it.  Being aware just means you can control it and create in your life those dreams and goals and experiences you want.

It’s worth empowering yourself to do it.

In coming blogs, I will be discussing more on empowerment, on topics such as:

Empowerment for Women

Empowerment for Men

Empowerment for children and teens

We will refer back to this post also, because this is the foundation of empowerment, the fundamentals on which true empowerment is based and built.  Until and unless the process of empowerment described above occurs, nothing else can change!

If you feel this blog has empowered you, please feel free to share and reblog this information to your friends, family and other people in your network.  Every person on the planet desires empowerment and every one of us deserves the opportunity for it.  Please help.

Til next time, fair winds and full sails,

Ray Jamieson

“Don’t confuse poor decision-making with destiny. Own your mistakes. It’s ok; we all make them. Learn from them so they can empower you!”
Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free

Please also refer to my other posts on Empowerment:

Financial Empowerment

Empowerment for Men

Empowerment for Women

Empowerment for Teens

Empowerment for Children

Personal Empowerment

What would an empowered man do?

Self Confidence

Self confidence – a function of knowing what you are doing, knowing that you are good at doing it, and knowing the task will be successful.  It’s in your own knowing that you will succeed.

“Believe you can and you’re halfway there.” ― Theodore Roosevelt
Self Confidence

Of course I can fly!
upwithlifecoaching.com

Recently I wrote about Self Esteem; it has much in common with Self Confidence, but there are significant differences.

Self Esteem is feeling good about you.

Self Confidence is feeling good about your ability to perform in a given situation and knowing you can handle it.

I once gave a talk to a large group and a question around Self Confidence came up.  When asked how it was I could talk so easily in front of so many people, my reply caused a ripple of laughter.  I said “If you were the nursing mothers association, and I was giving a talk on breast feeding, I wouldn’t feel quite so confident!”

When you look at it, I’d have been talking on a subject I knew next to nothing about, to a group of people who were the acknowledged experts.  Both of these are key areas of potential failure – failing because I knew so little, and then being called out by people who knew so much.

Did I have a self confidence problem because I knew I’d fail if I was talking to a Nursing Mothers group?  No, not at all, because I knew I was already good at what I did when in my chosen environment.  I had a confidence benchmark, because I already knew I could speak confidently on my own topics.  It’s not my place to lecture people in their areas of specialty.

Success is most often achieved by those who don’t know that failure is inevitable.” ― Coco Chanel, Believing in Ourselves: The Wisdom of Women

From there, we can look at how to gain self confidence.  How do you develop self confidence?

Firstly, look for what you are good at.  Doesn’t need to be a major skill set, start small, regardless of whether you are actually a master at something.  Can you tie your shoelaces?  OK.  Can you tie them in a perfectly even bow?  Great.

Self Confidence

I can tie my shoelaces!
Image from marriagehelp.com

Look at what you have just said about yourself.  You have manual dexterity and an eye for detail.  Where else can you apply those skill sets?

This is the beauty of understanding yourself and getting a little tutoring in self development – your lessons teach you that being good in one area automatically means you are good at other things too – you don’t need to go try everything out to learn that!  You can be CONFIDENT about it, without ever doing it!

The key to self confidence: because you can do one thing well, it means you can also do other things well!  Your skills and abilities are transferable between tasks and challenges.

I hear the Nay-Sayers:  “But there are things I am hopeless at!  Can’t I feel bad about not being good at something?”

That’s your choice, but I’m not going there.  You see, there are things I’m hopeless at too.  Keep me away from a filing cabinet – you don’t want me filing for you!  Not my skillset.  I could lose every important document you ever had in quick time.  But I wouldn’t feel bad about it; because I know it’s not my thing.  I have a filing system arranged for me here, and instructions on what to do with it.  The main file I use is called, wait for it:  DATA ENTRY REQUIRED!  And not by me!  My self confidence doesn’t get dented just because I know I can’t file papers.  Other people can, so they do it.  I don’t.  It’s that simple!  I am no rocket scientist and that doesn’t concern me either.  Nor am I a botanist, although I love looking at flowers.  I just look; it’s close enough and safer for the plants.

See the emerging picture?  Leave the things alone that you don’t have to do, or are not good at.  Find someone who can handle what you can’t.  But pour your heart and soul into what you can do well and feel great about it.  Another secret to self confidence, let the good feelings about what you do well, the self confidence feelings, overflow into the rest of your life!

Here is a classic example of a downward spiral in self confidence.

Billy is at work and messes up a contract.

The boss bawls him out over it and the whole of the office hears it.  The people he supervises now wonder about him and he feels their eyes boring into him.  The end of the day comes and he escapes to the sanctuary of home, where he reluctantly tells his wife about his humiliation.  She is all comforting and makes him a nice dinner, then they put the kids to bed and she says “Come to bed and make love with me….!”

Up to that point, he was starting to recover, but now, he has to perform again and his mind suddenly goes back to the session with the boss, and he has already been humiliated once today, over his work performance!  He pours himself another drink and decides to watch TV instead.  One humiliation a day is enough for our Billy!  Bad move, Billy!

Self confidence can spiral both ways.

Self Confidence

I GOT THE CONTRACT!
2findtrueluv.blogspot.com

Billy could have thought about all the things he was good at, and perhaps considered that his boss was also having a bad day and that was why the loud voices, rather than the regular quiet discussion over the contract.  He could have decided that one mistake doesn’t a failure make, told his wife about it and celebrated with her that he was thinking of a way to regain that contract next day.  After an evening of loving and nurturing with his wife, and a great sleep afterwards, he could go into work next day with enthusiasm and inspiration to pick up the phone and win that contract back…

The lesson from this is that our attitude and the self development environment we create around ourselves plays a huge part in our self confidence.  If we choose to be in an environment where goals are set each day, where our achievements are celebrated every day, where positive self talk is the norm, and where we review and reflect on our day every evening with a view to setting up tomorrow for success also, then an occasional flop is only going to create a great campfire story, rather than a downward spiral into depression.  Creating this type of environment is actually a choice you can make at any time.  If you choose not to surround yourself with positivity and celebrations of your successes, what ARE you choosing as your environment?

If your self confidence is important to you, then creating an environment that fosters self confidence is critical for you.

How do you create such an environment, which builds and multiplies your self confidence?

Check out this page on Success Habits and perhaps the recent blogs on Self Esteem and Self Development Tips.  They will show you the way to a whole new world to live in, one where you get to be King or Queen – which ever you choose!

Til next time, fair winds and full sails!

Ray

New Years Resolutions

New Years Resolutions

#New Years Resolutions

What are you planning for your New years Resolutions?
Courtesy of http://www.health.com

“An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.” Bill Vaughan

You might think it’s strange to be writing about #New Years Resolutions a month before Christmas.  However, on December 31st, at 11.59 pm, when your New Years Resolutions are about to take effect, it’s likely your mind will be on Auld Lang Syne, champagne, a clock counting backwards or looking for someone to kiss and say “Happy New Year” to!

Where it will NOT be, is on your New Years Resolutions!

There will be some folks who ask you, in the wee small hours after the stroke of midnight “Whatcha gunna do fer yer Noo Years Reso (Hiccup) lootions?” and even if you answered, they aren’t going to remember.  No, that’s no time to be talking about New Years Resolutions.

Now is the time.  Now is when you can start to look back at the year just gone and decide whether or not you are happy with it.  If not, can you make it so you will be happy with it by the end of the year?  And if you can’t make it right by the deadline, now is the time to start planning to do it better next year.  But not just planning to do it better – the road to hell is paved with good intentions, putting a program in place that ensures it will be better!

What are New Years Resolutions?

They are goals.  Anyone who says they have never set a goal, but who has made New Years Resolutions has set goals.  They may not have achieved them, but they have set them.

There is a formula for success with goals, and it’s not a hard one to adopt.  However, the challenge is maintaining your efforts towards achieving the goal, and that’s where a bit of structure comes in handy.  There’s a blog about it HERE. The old “SMART” mnemonic is still valid when deciding on the New Years Resolutions.

S = Specific.  Exactly the condition and result you expect.

M = Measurable. You need to be able to evaluate your progress and have the progress under your control.

A = Attainable/realistic.  A stretch for you maybe, but certainly possible to achieve.

R = Relevant.  It has to be something that fits in with your life, direction, desires and makes sense in your world.

T = Timely – within a set time frame.  It has a deadline, so you cannot procrastinate with it.

This is the WHAT of New Years Resolutions; deciding what will make your new year better than the last, but HOW you achieve it is a little different and the most challenging part.  That’s where you need a program that will keep you on track. That may or may not involve other people, but it almost always involves a little self-discipline and a routine of success habits that you plug into to make sure your goals achieve the priority in your life they deserve, whilst giving you the freedom to live that only a life with a “Plan B” in place can feel like!

What has prevented you achieving your earlier New Years Resolutions?

Statistics show that only 8% of people are successful at achieving their New Years Resolutions.  49% sometimes succeed, and 24% NEVER succeed!  Why is this?  Why do so many fail?

Sometimes, they were the wrong ones to begin with, set in haste over a celebratory or reflective drink, trying to fix things that were never going to work.  However, even with the right goals and New Years Resolutions, obstacles still crop up.  Financial troubles, people letting you down, availability of necessary items, resources and even time.

This all requires planning because the one thing we all know is that when you plan something, you need to plan also for it going over budget and over time – it’s called contingency planning!  You need a “Plan B” built into your program!

Things do happen to upset plans.  It can be from your own cause – such as forgetting a previous commitment, ill health, family commitments clashing and lots more.  It can be from external causes, such as the weather, your employer making an unexpected demand on your time, a promotion or other change, losing your job, a car breakdown or a disaster from someone else that drags you in, and so on.

Contingency plans are made to handle such situations.  Put simply, you need to allow for extra resources in all areas, including time, manpower, money and whatever else is specifically relevant to your New Years Resolutions.

Why do only 8% of people succeed with New Years Resolutions?

People who explicitly make resolutions are 10 times more likely to attain their goals than people who don’t explicitly make resolutions.  In other words, people with a plan!  These successful people think about them in advance, write them out and set them as a goal.

Incidentally, this is about the same success rate as regular goalsetting!

Why bother with New Years Resolutions?

Because the New Year is a time of change!  A time of renewal.  A time to review and correct what hasn’t worked for you, and to take time to plan ahead and get it right!  The human evolutionary drive (Entrepreneurs Credo) is such that we are programmed to strive for better – we cannot escape it.

However, throughout the year, we are all full on busy with work and life commitments.  The end of the old year/start of the New Year is the one time of year generally when people can take a little time off to celebrate with family and friends, reflect, review their progress and restart the New Year with renewed vigour, enthusiasm and New Years Resolutions that may make the coming year better than the previous one.

#New Years Resolutions

Sydney Harbour on New Years Eve
http://www.redbubble.com

How do you make sure you can put your New Years Resolutions out there, and make them turn into your New Years reality?

Plug them into a program, a system that will ensure they work.  A program that provides that supportive environment around you that encourages you to focus on what is important, and protects you from distractions that would take you away from the important challenges, of being the best you that you can be, and that you and your family deserves. Check out this blog on why you should systemize personal development if you are wondering why you need a system to plug into.

If you enjoyed this blog and value the message, please share it and reblog it.  Who knows what a difference it could make in someone else’s life!

Til next time, fair winds and full sails.

Ray

#New Years Resolutions

Celebrate every success!
http://www.thatsfit.com

© Life Change 90 2013

Self Esteem

“If you make friends with yourself you will never be alone.” ― Maxwell Maltz
#Self Esteem

Yep, that’s me!
Courtesy of http://www.blisstree.com

Welcome to my new WordPress Blog.  My last blog on Self Development Tips was from the Life Change 90 Blogsite – I have joined the WordPress Blog fraternity and it feels great!  I promised to follow on with how to create great Self Esteem and here it is, the two ways to develop Self Esteem.

Self Esteem

There are really only two ways to develop a feeling of high self esteem, unless you were born into a naturally nurturing environment, where you were brought up to feel good about yourself from early childhood.  If that is you, then congratulations – spread the goodwill, if not, these are the other two ways.

The first way to build high self esteem.

As a teenage guy, I had all the insecurities that most other teenage guys had, and I had a few more that many didn’t have!  I lived miles from town, had little social interaction outside of school, was taller than all my classmates and a lot bigger, although I was fit and strong without being overweight.  I always came top of my class right through school and was a champion athlete; I was ridiculed heaps for these – mostly by those who envied those attributes.  However, the ridicule struck, and stuck, went to the bone.

At the ripe old age of 18 years, I asked one of my mates, one of the ones who had a queue of girlfriends, why he had luck with the girls and I had none.  Wasn’t I good looking enough?

His answer, coming from the heart of the true friend he was to me, stayed with me for the next 15 years.  He said:  “You are a ruggedly handsome looking sort of guy.  Don’t worry, it will happen…..!”

In that instant, I associated ruggedly handsome with being unlucky in love, a poor communicator with women, and everything else negative that I was experiencing.  I suddenly realised how much I didn’t like being ‘ruggedly handsome’…

Life went on.  I left the family farm I grew up on and bought my own, married, had a son, divorced, lost a business, started another, became very successful at making people wealthy after rescuing them and their businesses from the stock market disaster in 1987.  Life was great, I was powering, had money, everything, but despite all this I still didn’t like me.

In 1989, I began some self development work on me.  I had to – I was a machine at work, ruthlessly despatching banks to the scrap-heap in getting better deals for my clients, hard-nosed negotiations, precision calculations, strategies, but utterly devoid of fun or interest in life and living.  I was great at what I did, but at living, I sucked badly.

In this self development program, something triggered a switch in me.  I took stock of what I had achieved, what I was doing and what I was capable of.  I looked at the amazing people around me, people who considered us to be friends, people who respected me, and it started to do things to me, in my head, stuff I had never felt before.  I was successful, I had so much credibility with the people I worked with, I mixed with globally significant figures in business and was developing a significant business profile in my own right.

I had an epiphany.  I got out of bed one morning after a period of these unsettling thoughts and emotions (what were they?) and when I looked in the mirror, it was like I looked at a different person.  I suddenly said “You’re OK!  I’m OK!”

I suddenly realised that what my dear friend said all those years ago was absolutely wrong for me.  It was just his well-meaning words at the time, trying to ease the concerns of his good mate, who wasn’t getting lucky with the girls.  That wasn’t me.  If it was back then, it certainly wasn’t now.  In that instant, I got to like me, like what I was, what I did, what I stood for and I started to feel again, starting with feeling good about me!

The epiphany came about because I had been forced, by this self development work, to start looking at and taking stock of my life and coming to realise that I was actually an OK guy, doing some great stuff!

This was the hard way to develop self esteem.  It might just as easily have gone the other way – if I didn’t like what I found in my stocktake, it might have gone very differently.

#Self Esteem

This was me – without the dress! pregoandtheloon.wordpress.com

But there is an easier way.

The second way to guarantee high self esteem.

In the 1960’s, a guy called Maxwell Maltz is reported to have said at the launch of one of his books, ‘confidence and self esteem is built from repeated experiences of success’.

Therefore, if you consciously place yourself in situations where you will, or are likely to have repeated experiences of success, then your self esteem and confidence will grow.  It must grow!  The trick is knowing where that place is!

The reality is that it’s not hard.  The concept of goal setting within a self development program is what is required.  Creating an environment that nurtures and supports you, with affirmations in the environment, daily counting of successes, setting them up as little goals in the morning and checking them off each evening, checking your moods each day, learning to be aware of them and finally to anticipate and set them consciously, all of these elements build to a powerful self esteem, based on actual successes and personal growth within you.

#Self Esteem

This was REALLY me!
Courtesy of http://www.lifedaily.com

You can build self esteem accidentally like I did, and hope that after some time (I took 15 years!) you will realise you are OK too, and you always were.  Or you can step into a framework that does it all for you.  It’s possible.  Check out this blog on why you should systemize personal development, or even here, about why bother with personal development.

Twenty years on, much has evolved to enable you to consciously choose the outcomes that I stumbled upon, and fortunately landed in a good place.  Some folks from those times didn’t make it and unfortunately ended up well away from where they wanted to be.  As teens, we admired and envied some of our mates but now, I see that much of what we envied got those guys into serious trouble fitting into and creating a life of success.

There are better ways.  And they all require good self esteem!

If you enjoyed this blog and value the message, please share it and reblog it.  Who knows what a difference it could make in someone else’s life!

Til next time, fair winds and full sails.

Ray

“You can always find the sun within yourself if you will only search.”
Maxwell Maltz