A Lesson Of Life for each one of us

“That men do not learn very much from the lessons of history is the most important of all the lessons that history has to teach.”   ― Aldous Huxley, Collected Essays.  

Lesson of Life

Massive Bulldozer lifting power. Image from hulcher.com

Or: The Lesson of Life I learned from a bulldozer and a bucket of oil!

Think back to 1984, if you can.

This was the time of the war over the Falklands Islands, between England and Argentina. It was the year Indira Ghandi was assassinated. Reagan made his famous joke: “My fellow Americans, I’ve signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five minutes.” He supposedly didn’t know the microphone was on. It was the year of the summer Olympics in Los Angeles, and the Soviet Union boycotted it. Wonder why. 1984 is the name of George Orwell’s famous novel, although he wrote it in 1949. It was the year the first “megabit” chip was ever made in Bells Laboratories – the event that heralded and made possible the super computers. 1984 was the year the “Bill Cosby Show” had its first TV premiere.

1984 was the year my old bulldozer gave me the most amazing lesson of life.

In that former life, I had a farm and an earth moving business, doing land clearing, soil and water conservation dams and channels, noxious weed management, tree removal and levelling building blocks, regular bulldozer type work.

I need to give you some idea of the scale of the machinery used, to put this into perspective.

Lesson of Life

Ironbark Tree – image from nationalregisterofbigtrees.com.au

Imagine a tree, 100 feet tall, around 30 metres. That’s half as long again as a cricket pitch. This tree is an ironbark tree, half a metre through at the trunk. It has branches and leaves on top, roots around 2 metres deep in the earth, and with a big clump of soil around them. It had to be moved. My bulldozer was actually a track loader with a clam bucket on the front (similar to the photo above), useful for picking up objects in the big jaws. The tree was gently pushed over and laid on the ground, roots and all. My bulldozer came alongside, clamped the jaws over the trunk of the tree, picked it up and carried it across the field to a large log pile, lifted it 15 feet (4 metres) into the air and laid it on top of the pile, for pole harvesting later. That was easy. And it shows the power of the hydraulic system of this particular bulldozer.

Earth moving equipment needs to be maintained for it to work properly, and there are many moving parts, using lots of oil.

Onto the lesson of life. We, my assistant David and I, were doing a regular oil change. The hydraulic oil was very special – read ‘expensive’. In 1984 dollars, when a 5 gallon can of regular oil was $20, this was $200! Every drop precious. We drained the old oil, and replaced the filters and the oil plug. Because the machine was so big, we were working on opposite sides of it. David was 18 years old and as fit, flexible and athletic as any farm kid in those days. I called out to him:

“David, I’ve replaced the plug and tightened it. I’m ready to put the new oil in. Have you tightened the filters?”

“Yep. They are tight.”

In went the new oil, glistening gold as it poured down the funnel. I wiped my hands on an oil rag, then climbed up to start the engine. As it started, a spray mist of fine gold particles created a perfect rainbow arc beside me. The precious oil was gone in seconds. David hadn’t tightened the filters enough after all! The incredibly powerful hydraulic pump that could lift a 100 foot tall iron bark tree up in the air, roots and all, pumped all that expensive oil out into a magical golden rainbow.

I shut the engine down and sat for a few seconds in silence. David stood there, out of range, but prepared to sprint for the cover of the bushes behind him. Much went through my mind. First was the thought of the cost. Then there was the thought of how much spare oil we had, because the job had to go on. Then there was David, almost rooted to the spot in fear, very apprehensive about what I might do. He looked ready to bolt into the bush and make his way home across country. A virtual whirlwind of thoughts. However, although I felt like a good butt-kicking would release some pressure from the head of steam I had developed, I didn’t feel it would achieve much else. There had to be a better way.

I looked at David, with a purposely blank expression. “I should have checked those filters, shouldn’t I?”

He just looked back in surprise – not expecting that. He was expecting spanners or other loose objects to be hurled at him I think. He mumbled something in reply but I don’t think his lips had reconnected to his thoughts at that time.

“Could you get the other drum of oil please David? I’ll clean this up and tighten the filters again.”

We put the new oil in and it tested perfectly; back to work we went.

Lesson of Life

That’s about right!           Image from bestsayingsquotes.com

What was our lesson of life?

In the years since 1984, I have found so many lessons that came from that incident. I’ll list a few:

1. Getting angry didn’t serve anyone. Dealing with the problem did.
2. Blaming didn’t serve anyone. Taking responsibility did. On that point – was David to blame? He did say he tightened the filters. But David was an 18 year old staring goggle eyed at a huge machine, the likes of which were out of his imagination before he came to work for me. He was under my instruction, and it was my responsibility to make sure he understood and did what was necessary. No, I should have checked!
3. Monitor what you delegate. That came home with a $200 price tag, in 1984 – I have since had whole weekend seminars that taught me less than those few seconds and cost more too! Powerful lesson.
4. Teaching and imparting lessons rather than blaming for mistakes gains respect and trust.

I’ll spend a moment on this point. David was only 18 and this could have sent him packing, back to a cranky father with a drinking and gambling problem. Instead, it was a turning point in his life, as I later came to find out. From that moment on, he stepped up and took responsibility for maintenance. Never again did anything go unchecked; nothing was ever allowed to leak oil, rattle, or other than behave like brand new. It became his mission, to look after my machinery and be the best operator possible. He became a zealot!

We worked together for another couple of years when the business expanded and we took delivery of a massive earth moving scraper. When the dealer left after unloading and setting it up, I threw him the keys and said “Look after this, would you?”

The look on his face was priceless. However, the pride he felt was evident and he applied himself to caring for that new machine also, as though it was his very own.

David did not need a reprimand on that pivotal day. A lesson of life comes in many forms and opportunities are often disguised as disasters. That day was perhaps my greatest lesson of life and as I reflect on it from time to time, still more comes through.

5. Nurture your people, to allow them to become what is possible. Understanding of their situation and circumstances means that sometimes, you’ll make allowances. When you do, they have the opportunity to see that you are treating them as an individual, not a number. David realised I cared how he felt, and although he expected to be given the blame, he already felt bad enough – no one needed to hammer it home any more. His growth from this incident was phenomenal, but only because he was nurtured through it.
6. Education is critical. I didn’t expect David to know everything. I worked from where he was in life and built on his knowledge from that point. When he left my employ, he could stand tall with anyone in the industry.
7. The lessons you teach are taught to others. Did David tell anyone about this incident? Yes. His younger brother was the first one who came to talk to me about it. Their relationship changed at that time, as David became his mentor, rather than his tormentor – which many older brothers are. They taught others how to deal with crises when it happened to them. And so it went, down the line. Who knows how far the benefits of that lesson of life on that day have gone.
8. If David’s lesson from the day was to react in anger, instead of how it happened, do you think that lesson would have been perpetuated? Of course. However, it broke a cycle of blame and anger that had been his family’s way for generations. One incident can change a life, depending on how you deal with it.

In the 30 years since this event, much has happened. When I sold the machinery, David went his own way and I entered the corporate world. I attended seminars and heard the greats speak of their lesson of life and the amazing incidents they recounted. However, I often wondered about how these much embroidered tales of their wisdom and mastery actually began. Did they have an oil can moment too?

With my current programs and coaching clients, I am most conscious of how important the simplest lesson of life can be. The opportunity to impart them is vital, as we never know where they will end up and who they will empower.

“The difference between school and life? In school, you’re taught a lesson and then given a test. In life, you’re given a test that teaches you a lesson.” ― Tom Bodett

Life Change Coaching?

We still have a couple of coaching places available for anyone wishing to experience and benefit from our life change coaching first hand.

At your free initial session;
• We will look at what you want and gain clarity on the cause or need for your desire for coaching and change.
• We will give you an objective perspective of your situation and the opportunities, as well as the obstructions to your progress.
• Finally, we can help you establish a plan to progress your desires and goals to where you really want them to be.

If this is you, take a look at our Coaching Page, answer the simple questions at the bottom and send the answers through to us, to schedule your free session. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Til next time, fair winds and full sails.

Ray Jamieson

PPS: If you wish to read my book “Lessons of Life”, check it out here!

Related Posts:

Help From My Friends

“Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.” ― Helen Keller

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Pandoras Box

Pandoras Box

Image from chinahush.com/2009/10/21/amazing-pictures-pollution-in-china; Guiyu, Guangdong province, (广东省贵屿镇) rivers and reservoirs have been contaminated, the villager is washing in a seriously polluted pond.

Pandoras Box

Prawns feed in seagrass,
Bream take the prawns,
Snapper takes the bream,
then to the dolphin they fall.
But hiding away is an insidious evil,
Mercury is lurking, killing them all.

A dolphin goes belly up and floats in the surf,
“Too much mercury” says one expert.
“Didn’t happen here,” says another,
Who cares where it happened, brother?
Just know that it did!
“It’s not our problem!”
Who are we trying to kid?

The dolphin told us the time is at hand,
To take a step back and look at our land.
Look at the stuff we pour down our drains,
Then we wonder, “Why all these pains?”

It’s really not hard to see why it is,
If we look to our fishes, our oceans and seas.
A solitary can lies in sand amidst coral,
Testimony to man, visiting Great Keppel.
Take him and flog him for this heinous crime,
For sullying God’s paradise with filth and grime.

His laziness is littered all over our shores,
Like pus, oozing from festering sores.
What’s the medicine, the cure, be quick,
“Get off your ass, clean up the grass,
Give the fishes something clean to drink!”

Who’ll put the lid back on Pandoras Box,
And seal it up tight with great big locks?
Is it too late for the fish in the sea?
Maybe for that dolphin,
but what about you and me?
Was our dolphin the messenger, a martyr for us,
To wake us, to clean up our mess?

If we could start again and rewrite the pact
With Mother Earth, our planet, an agreement to enact
To honour the fishes, the birds and the sand,
Would she still let us be custodians of this land?

© Ray Jamieson 1996

Pandoras Box

Image from chinahush.com/2009/10/21/amazing-pictures-pollution-in-china; In the Yellow Sea coastline, countless sewage pipes buried in the beach and even extending into the deep sea.

I wrote this poem after a holiday on Great Keppel, in the mid 1990s. The pollution around the amazing island of Great Keppel off the Queensland Coast infuriated me. However, more recently, something else raised my ire. It shouted that Pandoras Box is still wide open!

Pandoras Box

Image from teachoceanscience.net; drink can in a coral reef, just as I saw while diving off Great Keppel Island, on Australia’s Great Barrier Reef!

A scientist was warning of the threat of sea levels rising due to ‘global warming’. By the end of the century, sea levels may rise by 200 millimetres and threaten vast areas of coastal settlements. That’s true; if it happens it would be an issue for low-lying areas of settlements. However, it seems that in the 2 decades since I wrote this poem, little has happened to deal with the much greater threat of the poisons we are pouring into our waterways and oceans and polluting the great planet we call home! So what if sea levels rise, if all the fish in the oceans are dead or mutated?

Science seems to be evenly divided on whether the planet is warming or not. There is little genuine scientific evidence either way, as temperatures do not seem to have risen appreciably over this time, and for everywhere that claims to have had a rise in temperatures, somewhere else claims a fall. There are as many scientists expecting a mini ice age as there are a global warming outcome and frankly, history suggests it will cool before it warms again! After the Hockey Stick Fraud, the Himalayan Glacial Fraud and the Forged Email fraud, the IPCC credibility as far as global warming goes has been left in tatters. Neither has the anti-global warming side been able to conclusively prove scientifically that there is no threat! But it doesn’t matter!

Nothing matters while our oceans and rivers are still polluted! Pandoras Box is wide open!

In 2011 I wrote a blog The Hypocrisy of the Greens on this topic and specifically pointed out the pollution levels of rivers and marine ecosystems across China and South East Asia, because of the billions of people affected by this pollution. It has now got to the stage where 40% of the Asian seafood available in Australian supermarkets is tainted with pollutants that were outlawed decades ago, and with the levels of these pollutants making the seafood unfit for human consumption! However, for those living on the rivers and their floodplains and relying on them for their daily meals, 100% of their daily intake is of toxic food.

Outside of Asia, we have industrial areas all over the planet pumping chemicals into great rivers such as the Rhine, Danube, Thames, Mississippi and many more, each with a vast floodplain, and each supporting millions of people and massive ecosystems, either directly or indirectly.

Pandoras Box

Image from encyclopediadubuque.org; MISSISSIPPI RIVER BASIN WITH FLOODPLAIN AREAS IN RED

It’s up to the local people in every ecosystem, every catchment area, to clean up their own local waterway. Pandoras Box is wide open – can we get it closed again? Can we solve the problems we created through pollution of the planet, without getting side-tracked by petty arguments about whether the temperate will rise or fall a degree, or whether sea levels will rise or fall a few millimetres over the next few decades?

Pandoras Box

Image from lplmc.com.au; Clean Up Australia Day on the waterways

This takes discipline from everyone involved, people, communities and nations, over long periods of time. The problem didn’t occur overnight and won’t be solved by next week, if ever this Pandoras Box can be closed again.

If you want to develop your personal self-discipline, look at the program Life Change 90. On a daily basis, it will prompt you to take another step forward towards being all you can be, and if healing this planet is part of it, then more power to you. If this is you, download Life Change 90 and start making a difference today.

If you have a business that works towards healing the planet or any business at all, then you need all the support you can get. The Business Profits Program might be for you. Unless your heart is in your business, and your business is profitable for you, then you are probably part of the problem, not the solution. Download the Business Profits Program and empower your business and your life and make your efforts count towards the contribution that is needed.

If you know other people who care about the planet and wish to contribute to healing it, then please pass this message on. The world needs as many of its residents as possible on the task!

Til next time, fair winds and full sails.

Ray Jamieson

Recent Life Change 90 Blogs:

Those who can MUST! We all can!

Those who can, must!

             Miracle on the Hudson River:                     Image from nydailynews.com

“You can’t do everything but you can do something!” ― Jeff Dixon

Those who can must!

It’s a simple philosophy, but profound, as many simple philosophies are. It came to me while musing on the world and life in general when, as a teenager, I was driving a tractor and plough in seemingly endless circles on the night shift, preparing a seed bed for planting. Deep in the night, alone with my thoughts, it resonated. Forty years later, it’s still my guiding principle.  #Those who can must!

Why is it that “those who can must”?

“Those who can must” is more than a one liner. It is possibly the most powerful philosophy of all. Why is it so important that we do all we can? What does it mean? Let’s look at the first part – “those who can”.

Those who can what?

Why is it that we have skilled crafts people? Artists, architects, builders, mechanics, pilots, plumbers, lawyers, accountants, entrepreneurs; each of these is a skill-set in their own right. If a person has one of these skill sets, why is it so critical that they be the best they can at it?

Look at what “being your best” can mean.

You’re a mechanic. What difference does that make, whether you are “your best” or not? After all, you’re just servicing family cars. EXACTLY! The young mother who brings the family’s second car in for you to maintain, because the lousy, cheap skate husband has the good car with the good tyres on to drive to his work, leaving mother with the old car to transport the precious cargo of children to and from school! (Yes ladies, this is a global problem – show your husband this blog and let him have both barrels!) If you are an average mechanic, you’ll pop the hood, change the oil, check the water and let it go. If you are an excellent mechanic, being your best, you’ll be aware of the valuable cargo this vehicle carries, children – our future population – and take a closer look at the tyres, brakes, steering, suspension and even the seatbelt fittings. Because you know that when it rains again, your workmanship could be the difference between this little car spinning out of control and putting those lives at risk, or not!

Those who can, must!

Mum’s Taxi? Image from http://www.vintag.es

What about being a pilot? You became a pilot perhaps because you loved flying and decided to make a career out of it. Now, you fly commercially and may have anywhere from 5 to 500 passenger lives under your control on any flight. Only this year, we have seen two Malaysian jet air liners crash, taking nearly 300 lives each time. It‘s obvious there is a huge responsibility on airline pilots to be the best they can. Yet in the news yesterday we saw a report of an Indian pilot snoozing while in command, and the co-pilot playing on an iPad and didn’t notice that the jet had dropped 5,000 feet and put it on a collision course with other aircraft! A mid-air collision could have killed 500 people in the air and who knows how many hundreds more on the ground!

Why be the best pilot you can, even more than just staying awake? Because sometimes being the best means you could retrieve an impossible situation such as the pilot who landed a US Airways Airbus with 155 passengers on the Hudson River after a bird strike killed the engines and forcing the landing. This incredibly skilled pilot landed the huge plane on the river without loss of life and you can bet he wasn’t looking at his iPad at the time! Every second of his life’s experiences was with him, and came into play as he settled that jet airliner onto the river near the rescue boats and saved every life!

OK, so you’re not an airline pilot, you’re just a local railway worker. How important could it be, to be your best in a railway yard? If you haven’t seen it, look for the movie “Unstoppable” starring Denzel Washington. It’s about a heavily laden freight train that becomes a runaway, speeding into a heavily populated area with a very dangerous turn in the tracks, after a slack train driver is too casual about changing tracks and lets the train get away from him. Denzel’s character in real life – the film is based on an actual drama in Ohio – uses skill and imagination to find a way to stop the runaway train and avert the catastrophe that could have happened.

Everyone has something that they CAN do, but why is it that they MUST do it?

Everyone also has something they are hopeless at! It would be a wasted life if we spent it trying to do something we would continually fail at. Wasting our lives, wasting our energy, when there is someone else who is great at exactly that job we are failing at, and we are depriving them of the job they love! We have skills so that we CAN use them, for the good of our family, our community and the world in general. Imagine if Einstein continued being a children’s tutor, then a clerk all his life, instead of following his brilliance and passion into the fields of Science where he contributed so much to the world and humanity in general! He followed the ethos of “those who can must” brilliantly, and changed the way the world saw itself. He changed the future, changed the lives of you and I, a hundred years ago.

Those who can, must

He followed HIS passion! Thankfully! Image from hj.vc

When you and I follow the ethos of “Those who can must” we follow our passion and our skills into living and create lives that only WE can live. We are each unique and using our unique talents and abilities and fuelled by our passions, we can make differences like this too. Only WE can live OUR LIVES!

“Things won are done, joy’s soul lies in the doing.” ― William Shakespeare

Does “Those who can Must” apply to everyone? Who does this apply to?

This is for you and for me. Everyone can do something to contribute. Therefore, everyone must, if we are to make this world better for our children to follow on from us, to take our batons for the next leg of the Human Race.

Yes, that means you and me.

“You are responsible for doing what good you can with what you have, and any good is better than none.” ― Bryant McGill

But if you think, “I’m just a stay at home Mum”, then remember that this also applied to the parents of children such as Michelangelo, Leonardo Da Vinci and so many more parents we never hear about. We only hear about the achievements of their children.

Maybe a police officer who notices someone loitering and feels the energy of a crime in the making apprehends them, and prevents who knows how many muggings, rapes, assaults and robberies. Perhaps they also prevent the loiterer from continuing in their dark world any further; perhaps enabling redemption from a possibly wasted life to a life well lived.

The writer who creates fictional novels, wonders how “those who can must” applies to them. Think of Wilbur Smith. Besides giving joy, peace and relaxation to millions of readers, how many people have been inspired by his writing to contribute to the conservation of the endangered ecosystems of Africa, where poaching has all but decimated the populations of elephants, rhino, lions and many other species. His writing has brought the plight of these ecosystems and many others globally to public awareness, far beyond anything he ever thought about when he first put pen to paper. How many other aspiring writers has he inspired to follow their dreams and passion to also become published authors, and reach out to millions more around the globe with their own messages of hope and inspiration?

Even the lowly blogger – if your writing changes or influences the life of just one other person and puts them back on track, then you have done your part. You don’t need to be a global superstar; one life saved is well worthwhile!

Being an unsung hero may be our life’s calling, following our passion into whatever we do. We may never know the magic we create downstream from the effects we have on the lives of the people with whom we interact, but there is no doubt the magic is there, as long as we do our part, as long as those who can must, and then do!

“Those who can must”, demands that we seek and follow our passion and skills, so that we can provide for our families, enrich our communities and make our world a better place for those who follow us! Whilst it seems huge when you examine it like this, all it really means is that we be the best we can, at whatever it is we are good at. If you don’t know what that is yet, then perhaps look at the Business Profits Program, where your skills, abilities and passions are explored for you to find your life’s calling. Perhaps you will uncover your passion and your calling there, to enable you to do what you must.

If you know what your passion is but are having trouble finding the time, discipline or motivation to follow it, then Life Change 90 is for you. Putting a structure into your day, infusing it with the inspiration, motivation and congratulations that make a day both worthwhile and enjoyable, is what you need to create positive habits that will stay with you for your lifetime.

Perhaps all you need to do is to pass the message on so that someone else can find and follow their passion. If you know someone who is searching, looking for a way to put meaning into their life, who is a square peg in a round hole at the moment, this may be your way to help them. Pass the message on; let them have the opportunity to decide, with new information, where they want their life to go. It only takes one to make it worthwhile!

Til next time, fair winds and full sails,

Ray Jamieson

PS: We watched “Unstoppable” again this evening, on DVD. It’s one heck of a ride – treat yourself to watching it soon, to see what a difference a person can make when the chips are down!  Those who can must watch this movie!

“If your life is a miserable disaster, you might want to consider, that it’s because you are doing something wrong.” ― Bryant McGill

Recent relevant blogs:

Og Mandino – Lessons from the Master

Life Change 90 Relaunch

RISK

Empowerment through Challenge

Best Business Ideas For You

Moving House and all that stuff

#Moving House

Guess what?                                               Image from MotivatedPhotos.com

Moving House

“Move to a new country and you quickly see that visiting a place as a tourist, and actually moving there for good, are two very different things.”  ― Tahir Shah, Travels With Myself 

There’s something about moving house. New energy, new location, new start – another beginning. Yes, that’s all true. But so is the disruption, dislocation, disturbance and the dismay when the removalists, the phone or power company doesn’t keep their many promises to make this ‘the smoothest operation ever…..!”

And that’s where we are – moving house! For the next couple of weeks, we may, or may not get a chance to get more blogs out, but rest assured, after we settle into the new home, there is so much waiting for you. For example, the next couple of blogs – titles coming are “Empowerment Lessons from an Oilcan” and “Where to start”. Powerful, fundamental stuff, with a great story embedded around the lessons I found along the way.

Just like tonight. Moving house.

#Moving house

Oh no! I love doing that!              Image from motleynews.net

How do you keep your head together when the plan is to disrupt, dissemble and generally pull apart every part of your life as it is, box it and reassemble many miles and hours later?

There’s a way that is working for me. I work from the Life Change 90 program, and the organisation it provides in my day is handling everything for me. I put in my challenges and goals for the day each morning, I get my pep talk and off I go. The progress has been amazing – we are actually some days ahead of schedule! Then in the evening, I sit for a few minutes, tick off what we have achieved, tally the results, write a few words about the day and its progress and enable tomorrow’s plan and schedule to come through. I note that and I’m outta here – those few minutes morning and night have made the rest of my day so smooth!

One of the things I am working on is a mild revision of the Life Change 90 program. Correcting a few typo errors in the original text, which somehow I missed before it went to the producer, and adding a few details in a few sections to make it even simpler to understand and live with. By the end of the month, I expect the new version will be uploaded and available to you. If you are one of the folks who take a copy in the meantime, you’ll have the new one emailed to you, as soon as we get it back to us! No charge!

If you’d like this level of support in your day, whether you are moving house, or moving mountains, this is where to get it. Click here and download the best friend you could wish for online! If you know someone else who needs something like this, send it to them and share the love. After all, everyone needs a friend!

Til next time, fair winds and full sails. And removalist trucks!

Ray

“Some part of me can’t wait to see what life’s going to come up with next! Anticipation without the usual anxiety. And underneath it all is the feeling that we both belong here, just as we are, right now.” ― Alexander Shulgin

#Moving house

OK, we are ready!              Image from blog.gamos.gr

Driven or Drifting

#Driven or drifting

Driven? Image from Forza Motorsport

#Driven or drifting

Drifting? Image from duotraq.com

Driven or Drifting

“Freedom lies in being bold.” ― Robert Frost

We are moving house at the moment. It’s a time of frantic activity, packing, planning and preparing for a major change. And it’s OK! We are enjoying the activity because we know there are great things to look forward to. The knowing is driving us forward to the new experiences we will share there.

After we arrive at our new home, we’ll unpack, get ourselves settled in, and then relax.

From time to time in everyone’s life, we are driven by a need, compulsion, goal or ambition, or fear. At other times, when none of these stimulants are present, we can find ourselves drifting, just cruising. Both are OK. As long as we are aware of what state we are in, and are happy with it.

It’s when we are unconsciously in a state of either being #driven or drifting that we can get into trouble.

Can you be unconsciously driven?

Yes. Consider the workaholic. Ask them why they work 18 hours a day and they may not know, or just say there’s “a lot on at the moment” and keep working. However, it’s a subconscious compulsion, driven by who knows what. It’s not something they can control; it actually controls them, and in the process, may ruin lives, relationships, health, businesses and more.

#Driven or drifting

Choices… Workaholic! Image from rockinmarriage.com

Workaholics are not the only ones driven by unconscious compulsions and drivers. There are all the other ‘holics’ as well, plus those obsessed with anything that prevents them from enjoying the ebb and flow of normal life. Collectors are a great example. It’s wonderful to collect items of special significance to you. However, when it takes over your life, costs you financially, emotionally, ruins relationships, health and families, even your best friend will suggest that your obsession with collecting bottle tops has taken over – your life is no longer your own!

Can you be unconsciously drifting?

Yes, again. When the rush dies down, it’s nice to sit on the couch and watch a movie, or read a book. It’s a natural cycle of life that we rest and recharge the batteries before the next big push. But what if there is no ‘next big push’?

The danger of being too comfortable.

When life is cruising like this, each day is a routine where nothing challenging happens, perhaps beyond some traffic, your team losing or the local store being out of your favourite item, the danger is that your mind, and sometimes your muscles, atrophy. “Use it or lose it” is the old saying, and there’s a lot of value in it.

#Driven or drifting

Opportunity passing by. Image from wilywalnut.com

We know that one of the greatest defences against mental illnesses such as Parkinson’s or dementia, for example, is to actively challenge your mind. Crossword puzzles, electronic games and other specific mental activities force the mind and the brain to work and create fresh new neural pathways, that somehow manage to stave off the onset of these degenerative mental illnesses for years, even when there is a genetic predisposition towards them. Being lazy has a terrible price to pay, and it’s not a direct cost. It’s the cost of what you can lose, both in opportunity and function, by not getting out and taking part in life, contributing and being challenged by life. Sometimes the greatest losses are only realised later, when you learn that an incredible opportunity passed by, while you were sitting on your couch!

Balancing life’s driven and drifting cycles.

Human beings need goals, as something to aim for, a purpose, something to identify with and to look forward to.  As a species, we need something to look forward to, something to give us some brightness of the future, some hope. Even the worst day or mood can be lifted when the person is shown a little something they value, something to look forward to. At best, the goals we set can be empowering, motivating and inspirational, as they should be. Whether it’s a family goal, or the love of family that motivates and drives us, or whether it’s a goal to be the greatest in the world at something, it doesn’t matter. As long as it moves us, and stops the atrophy.

However, to balance it, we all need some downtime. Our bodies have a “circadian rhythm”, a 24 hour cycle in which we are programmed for a period of driven activity, and a period when the program is for the body to sleep, to rest and recuperate. Driven or drifting throughout a 24 hour period. Genetically, this is how we are programmed.

Mentally, it’s similar with being driven or drifting, but with different time frames. If we have an interest in something, we are inspired and motivated by it, but when we complete that challenge, the drive to understand and master it, that drive often dissipates and we can move on from it. Depending on what it is, that cycle can last from moments to days, months or years. At the end of that cycle, the mind needs to tune out, before tuning in again on something new.

Even the most satisfying career or job needs us to take a break, to maintain our freshness and enthusiasm. We take annual holidays – at least, we should! Most employment contracts specify some time off each year, but it’s great also to take breaks on weekends, to escape from the rush, the drive and to ‘smell the roses’, appreciating our family and friends and life other than the career or driving force.

#Driven or drifting

Moving house? Image from removalists.com

Just like my wife and I will rest after we move into our lovely new home, and unpack the boxes containing our lives. We will rest, recover and start the forward planning process again, from a new base.

Are you locked into a rhythm of being too much driven or drifting?

How do you know? And what can you do about it?

The first step towards regaining control of life, whether you are driven or drifting, is to be aware of what you are doing. Consciousness is not something everyone is good at! How many times have you driven to work, and only realised when you arrived that you had no memory of the trip? Or the train or bus ride? When we develop a routine of checking in on awareness each day, we regain consciousness of our activities, our thoughts and our direction, and only then can we begin to take back control of our lives. That provides the opportunity to decide on our driven or drifting schedules, when to set and work on our inspirational goals, and when to take time to relax, recuperate and drift along with the flow of life.

The next step is to consciously assess where we are in life compared to where we want to be, and decide on how to make up the differences. Setting goals to achieve the necessary steps to catch up to where we decided perhaps in our youth, where we wanted to be by each certain age. Life throws us curve balls, and only when we become conscious do we realise that we haven’t achieved everything we wanted, or we are not feeling the satisfaction from it that we expected.

That’s when a program to raise awareness and provide the discipline and skills you need to get back on track can be such a powerful aid to progressing towards the life you dreamed of. That program would inspire you each morning, refresh your goals for you and point out the action steps you needed to take that day, provide you with a ‘to do’ list of other life matters for the day, and close your day with a cheer, congratulating you on your achievements, and inspiring you to look forward to tomorrow. You can have that program; it’s HERE! To find out more about it, click this link and picture yourself moving forward into the life you dreamed of, only this time, with the guidebook you always knew was somewhere to be had. Now you can have it!

If you feel inspired to take the next step now, perhaps others will too. Please forward this article and share it with others who you feel want more from their lives too. Change their lives, as well as your own.

Til next time, fair winds and full sails!

Ray Jamieson

When you take charge of your life, there is no longer need to ask permission of other people or society at large. When you ask permission, you give someone veto power over your life.   Abert F. Geoffrey

#Driven or drifting

I’m my own man! Image from super-trainer.com

Old Habits Die Hard

#old habits die hrd

Intense conditioning and programming of habits under way!
Image from git-security.com

“The chains of habit are too weak to be felt until they are too strong to be broken.”
Samuel Johnson

Old Habits Die Hard!

Norm was fresh out of the army.  For six years, it had been the ‘spit and polish’ routine, and “Yes Sir, No Sir” had been the way of life.  Now, all that was finished, Norm was back home for a while.  It felt good, having the chance to break away from all the routines and settle into the easier going life on the farm for a change.  Well, that was the intention. Old habits die hard!

The first day back, and his father decided to bring in a load of firewood.  While Norm and the other boys polished off breakfast, Dad put the chainsaws on the truck, along with a few crow bars and axes.

Breakfast over, the boys trooped out.  Suddenly Norm called out, “Hang on a minute,” and darted back into the house.  About a minute later, he reappeared, with a silly grin on his face.

“I don’t have to polish my boots for you bunch.” He said.  “Let’s go!”

#Old habits die hard!

“Some rules are nothing but old habits that people are afraid to change.”
Therese Anne Fowler, Souvenir

We all have conditioning drilled into us.  Conditioning is habit – we all have habits and have had for many, many years.  Our lives run by habit and that’s generally OK.  Takes a lot of pressure off remembering what to do, like breathe, walk and so on.  Subconscious programs are developed when we learn and develop habits.  We may not even realise they are running, while they take control of our lives.  Maybe we’d like to change them, but old habits die hard.

#old habits die hard

A habit to change?
Image from abcnewsradioonline.com

Not all conditioning or habits are good, and some may need to be changed as we outgrow them.  We do outgrow habits and their subconscious programs.

Habits and subconscious programs are like railroad tracks.  Hard to get off, once you get onto those rails.

#old habits die hard

A program in motion
Image from wikipedia.org

Programs can fail or go wrong, without us realising until it has happened.  That’s when trouble hits and we find the program no longer serves us.

#Old habits die hard

Can someone please explain this to me?
Image from gizmodo.com.au

Getting off tracks and out of habits and programs can be a challenge.  Old habits die hard!

#old habits die hard

A bit of a challenge changing tracks the hard way.
Image from ptarm.tumblr.com

However, done correctly, changing an unwanted habit or program can be easy!

#old habits die hard

Changing habits should be this easy!
Image from leungkm.blogspot.com

You just need to install a new program.  Not all old habits die hard, after all!

“Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.”
Jim Ryun

My Darling wife bought a new computer today.  A beautiful object, a work of art.  However, it’s useless.  It has no programs installed.  YET.  The program is in the box, ready to download.  Then, the computer will be ready to do the most amazing things for her.  With the new program installed.  Doing what SHE wants it to do.

#old habits die hard

Isn’t it lovely?
Image from zdnet.com

This is also how to change a habit you no longer want, a habit that is running as a subconscious program in your life.  Insert a different program into your computer.  Change your program!

#old habits die hard

One new program/habit coming up!
Image from http://www.mln.com.au

Yes, it can be done.  There is a program specifically designed to enable you to change habits, simply, quickly and without getting yourself off track and into trouble.  Creating a controlled environment around you, supportive, encouraging, and one that celebrates your successes and supports you into new habits and conscious programming of your mind and your life.  Old habits die hard, but only when you don’t know how to change them properly!

Click here to find out more about changing habits, and learning new ones that can make life so much better for you, in any way you desire.  And kick that old, unwanted habit to the kerb!

“A nail is driven out by another nail; habit is overcome by habit.”
Desiderius Erasmus

If you found this post to be empowering, and supports you into changing old programs and unwanted habits, please share it with your friends and associates.  Reblog it so that other people can gain these benefits too.  They will be grateful you did.

Til next time, fair winds and full sails,

Ray Jamieson

 “Warren Buffett chuckled and said to me “I hope it’s not my bad habits”. Good Habits once established are just as hard to break as bad habits, and bad habits are easier to abandon today than tomorrow. So what are you going to do about it?”
Lucas Remmerswaal, 13 Habits.com the Tale of Tortoise Buffett and Trader Hare

#old habits die hard

What a great New Habit!
Image from thingstodococoabeach.com

Empowered by Gratitude

Gratitude?

#Gratitude

A new day, a new start
Image from aquabumps.com

“Isn’t it nice to think that tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it yet?”
L.M. Montgomery

Did you wake up this morning?

That’s something to have gratitude for.  Many didn’t.  What does waking up each morning mean?

When you wake up each morning, or whatever time you wake up, it means you have another chance to start life all over again.  Now I know that some people are locked into a pattern which is not easy to break free of, and I’m thinking here of people in chronic pain, people who are on minimum wage and who know that finding a better paid job won’t be easy, and so many more people who have life challenges to face.

But you woke up, didn’t you?  That’s the first step towards a new life, a life change if you wish, but regardless of how you look at it, your life starts again the moment you wake up each day and that’s something to show #gratitude for.  You got another chance to start over.

What can you do with a new day?

Perhaps you can’t change everything in your life all in the next day, this new day you have given to you.  But you can change something if you need to, want to, or HAVE to!  Start small, with the single thing that will make the most difference if you change it.  A habit?  A thought?  Something you don’t do, but perhaps should?  Something, anything, but if your life is not exactly where you want it to be right now, at this time of your life, start making changes, little ones, to gently steer your life in the direction you need it to go.  Then show some gratitude, say a little “thank you” that you can do even this much.

How do you know if the change is the right one?

In a way, it doesn’t matter.  It’s the stagnation that is the death of a life.  Sometimes, any movement is better than none, but once you make a start, get some movement, you can steer from there.  It’s very hard to steer your car when it’s parked at the kerb.  You need to be moving, any direction at all, before you can steer it.  So start moving.  And show gratitude that you can actually move a little.  A little “Thank you” for the ability to move.

Gain some momentum.

Once you are moving, after your feet hit the floor, you started to move, you turned in the right direction, you got a little speed up.  Perhaps not much, but a little.  This is called momentum and there is power in momentum.  The weight of your movement, the mass of you moving along has a force.  Use it to shift other bigger things.  Point it towards obstacles, tack on another change or two and use your momentum to carry you through.  Old train drivers called this “getting up a head of steam” and there you go, you have momentum.  You are moving, steering, gaining power with your momentum and making more changes.  There’s something more to show #gratitude for, a little “thank you” for the momentum.

#Gratitude

A head of steam!
Image from burnham-on-sea.com

This is called changing your life, a step at a time.  It’s simple, but not always easy, and much depends on where you are starting from, whether at the top of the slope, or the bottom.

“It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all, try something.” – Franklin D. Roosevelt
“It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all, try something.” – Franklin D. Roosevelt
Read more at http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/10-quotes-to-change-your-momentum/#GZhkeeqdED5smDXI.99
“It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all, try something.” – Franklin D. Roosevelt
Read more at http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/10-quotes-to-change-your-momentum/#GZhkeeqdED5smDXI.99
“It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all, try something.” – Franklin D. Roosevelt
Read more at http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/10-quotes-to-change-your-momentum/#GZhkeeqdED5smDXI.99

Sometimes you need a hand.

Look around you.  How many people are there in your life?  How many of them do you think are feeling the same way each day, facing challenges and wondering how to make it?  There are a few, feeling just like you, and some feeling very challenged also, much more than you.  My Dad told me something that has stuck with me, when I was around 7 years of age and walking out on a frosty morning to milk the two old milking cows.  I complained about the cold frost on my boots and he said “I cried when I had no shoes, til I saw a man who had no feet!”  I didn’t realise he was quoting the old Sufi proverb but it didn’t matter.  I gladly walked down to the cow-bail, in gratitude for my boots.

There are many people who would like a hand, and many who would like to help you.  More than you realise.  Sometimes though, you need to take the first step on your own, to demonstrate to others that you are serious about the changes.

One way of making little changes that add up to a powerful momentum in a short period of time is to lock into a program that has these gentle changes built into it, and can help you decide what and when and where the most effective changes could be made.  That program also has a gratitude section in it, and without a doubt, showing gratitude for where you are already is perhaps the most powerful tool at your disposal! 

To learn more about this powerful program with the inbuilt gratitude program as well as all the other vital tools for changing your life, CLICK HERE NOW! 

You’ll be glad you did, as you watch your life change direction under your guidance, and build up a head of steam in a way that you will always want to show gratitude for!

Show some gratitude!

After all, you DID wake up this morning, didn’t you?

If you feel gratitude for the lessons I hope I have presented to your here, please reblog and share this post with your friends, family and associates.  Share your journey with them.  Everyone deserves an opportunity to look at their new day with fresh eyes and feel gratitude just for having the chance to start again, this new day.

Til next time, fair winds and full sails.

Ray Jamieson

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. 
Melody Beattie

By the way, if you are looking for some inspiration on how to make the most of your new day, please also refer to my other posts below on Empowerment: There might be something of special interest for you here.

Empowered by my Failures

Integrity, Spirituality and Empowerment

Empowerment through Emotional Intelligence

Financial Empowerment

Empowerment

Empowerment for Men

Empowerment for Women

Empowerment for Teens

Empowerment for Children

Personal Empowerment

What would an empowered man do?

Empowered by love

Personal Empowerment

Personal Empowerment

Personal Empowerment – starting young!
Image from http://www.huffingtonpost.com

Personal Empowerment.

asinha97
You are responsible for your life. So why expect something to happen for motivation. Self motivation is biggest drive for self empowerment. Anil Sinha

I recently sat with a man who had asked me to write his biography, his journey from weighing 350 pounds (160 kilograms) back to 200 pounds (90 kg).  After he told me his story, I had a question for him.  First, here is his story, briefly.

He had told me that as he grew fatter, just from being a glutton and careless, he grew too big to do his ceiling insulation batt business – he couldn’t fit through the manholes into the ceiling cavity, so he sold that business and bought a security patrol business.  Then he couldn’t get in and out of the patrol cars because of his rapidly expanding girth, so he sold that business too.  Eventually he began selling real estate in a city office because all he had to do was stand (or sit) near the front door where people would walk by, and he could talk to them.

Personal Empowerment

Something wrong with this picture
Image from nypost.com

However, the life changing chain of events for him began with the bicycle shop next door.  Sometimes he’d stand at his front door and chat to the owner of the bicycle shop, a former triathlete champion, and one day he asked him if he could try riding a bike, as he thought he might like to lose some weight.  Just making conversation.  The reply was that he didn’t stock a bike that would hold his weight!

Then he needed to run to the back of his shop again to the toilet, for the fifth time that hour, and the bicycle shop owner told him he needed to get ‘that’ checked out.  He already knew what his problem was.  The doctor told him after a few short minutes “You have chronic diabetes caused by your eating habits.  If you don’t lose 100 pounds this year, you won’t see next year!”  It scared him; he said those words felt like machine gun fire into his chest!

My question to him was: “If that doctor had not threatened you with your own death, at what point would you have decided you were overweight and needed to do something about it?”

His answer?  “I don’t know.  I never considered it!  I don’t know what it would have taken to have that amount of personal empowerment, to recognise my problem and deal with it!”

Personal empowerment is not a big deal.

Personal Empowerment

A whale of a time!
Image from selfimprovementdevelopment.com

My definition for personal empowerment is the willingness to honestly see yourself as you are, and to commit to making any changes you feel are necessary for your wellbeing, on any level, physical, mental, emotional or spiritual.

That just means that if you know you are not fit, you decide to change that and you do what you need to do, to become more fit.  If you have bad breath, you brush your teeth.  If someone tells you that your breath is bad, you don’t abuse them for being rude to you; you thank them for being honest with you and then you brush your teeth.

Being less than you can be, less than your human potential is a crime against yourself.  That doesn’t mean that you need to be training to be fit enough to run the next marathon.  It doesn’t mean you need to immediately begin to diet, or take any other radical steps.  It has nothing to do with vanity, and everything to do with your personal pride.  Look honestly at yourself. Ask yourself if you are the person you always wanted to be. If you can see how you can become closer to that ideal, then you need the strength to commit to making the changes that will get you there.

OK, I hear some howls of protest!  Personal empowerment?  I’m suffering from a chronic illness, I can’t do that!  I was in a car accident and my injuries won’t allow that!  I am overweight because I have a medical condition and the drugs affect me!

Relax.  The question is; are you being all you can be?  If you are ill, then you are ill and that will place limitations on you physically.  But how is your heart?  How is your spirit?  How is your mind?

Personal empowerment will take you from where you are in your life, to where you could be.  It’s not about being fitter, faster, smarter or better than anyone else, just being the best YOU that you could be.  Sometimes, personal empowerment is just being the best parent you can be, so that you can be an empowered parent for your children.  What this world needs probably most of all, is empowered people, who can be empowered parents, so that the next generation who are our children now can take over this world and continue to make it better and fix the mistakes we have made in getting it to them.

Personal empowerment is worth it.

But how do you get personal empowerment?

Personal Empowerment

It’s the little things that count!
Image from mylifeismymessage.org

It’s easy.  Baby steps each day.  It’s not a massive shift, it’s just a few little success habits to get into each day, and then continue to do them every day!  Not hard at all.  You already have a number of habits right now, perhaps some that don’t serve you that you could replace, others that you definitely want to maintain.  Like brushing your teeth.  But add some affirmations and goalsetting to that.  Perhaps doing a few minutes reading of something positive each morning and evening – just a few minutes.  Perhaps setting priorities for your day, specific things that will actually advance you a little closer to your goals.  Perhaps at the end of the day, doing a review and seeing what you achieved, what you learned, what you felt, and checking off what you actually did.  If you started a new habit, check off that you did it, or didn’t – make yourself accountable.

Get into success habits.  Start feeling a sense of achievement for the little things, so that when the big things come up and real personal empowerment is needed to face those challenges, you have already been practising, you have the success habits in place, all you are doing is changing the goal……!  See?  Simple.

That is personal empowerment.  A program with all of this exists now for you to slip into your daily routine; you can get it here.  A few minutes morning and evening and it is done.

The bonus is that it teaches you lots of other cool strategies as well, such as communication skills, financial success tips, stress management and health tips, mental strategies, conflict resolution, goal setting and a whole heap more over the 90 days of the program.  That’s the few minutes of positive and empowered reading material, a couple of hundred words a day to get you on track with life changing strategies in every area of your life.  Personal empowerment was never so easy!  Start your personal empowerment program now!

If you feel this article has empowered and benefited you and you feel it could benefit the personal empowerment of other folks you know, please reblog it, share it with your friends and associates.  It might be the day you changed someone’s life for the better!

Til next time, fair winds and full sails,

Ray Jamieson

Be ambitious towards your own personal enhancement.  Steve Mariboli

Please also refer to my other posts on Empowerment:

Financial Empowerment

Empowerment

Empowerment for Men

Empowerment for Women

Empowerment for Teens

Empowerment for Children

Personal Empowerment

What would an empowered man do?

EMPOWERMENT FOR MEN

#Empowerment for men

Strength and gentleness
Image from epicanthic.blogspot.com

As we look ahead into the next century, our leaders will be those who empower others. Bill Gates.

Empowerment for Men

There is a subtle distinction between commanding respect and loyalty, and demanding it.  The actions and words may be exactly the same; the distinction lies in the heart of the one desiring it.

#Empowerment for men

King Richard the Lionheart
Image from http://www.themiddleages.net

Throughout history, great leaders have been loved and their legacy lives on down the ages, with fond memories of them and their deeds.  They commanded the respect and loyalty of troops, nations, families and congregations.

Throughout history also, dictators have commanded great armies and nations but are reviled and their memories and legacies are of hate and revulsion.  Idi Amin, Hitler and many more whose names you will know.  These dictators are not limited to presidents, they occur in families also and the hate and revulsion felt for them is the same except that at this level, it is very, very personal.

So what is the distinction?

Empowerment for men is about the place us guys come from when we face the world.

If we feel the need to bully to get what we want, what we are really saying is “I’m not feeling confident or secure so I need to take what I want from people less powerful or able to defend themselves than me”.  This feeling of insecurity is the root cause of most of the bullying and dictatorial behaviour on the planet.

What is the option?

#Empowerment for men

The Butcher of Africa – Idi AMin
Image from http://www.barnesandnoble.com

True empowerment for men comes from a place of humility and service orientation, where we ask the world “How can I be of service?  How can I make this a better place?  What can I offer?”  Oddly enough, people rarely take advantage of a man who is strong and humble enough to ask these questions.  Instead, his open-mindedness and leadership is recognised.  People flock to him for his leadership, his strength and guidance.  Whether in a family, a congregation or a nation’s armies or parliament, leadership and strength combined with genuine humility is recognised, loved and admired.

When these two men pass, the dictator is reviled and the leader revered.  #Empowerment for men is the distinction.  Guys, remember this – your legacy is already under construction.  People are already making judgements on how you will be remembered.  Think about it; if you don’t like the legacy they believe you will leave, it’s time to start over.

And yes, it can be done.  Empowerment for men is not an event.  Empowerment for men is a way of life, if it is to mean anything at all.

Empowerment for men is not an accident.  It is a state of being that is chosen as a way of life.  Sometimes the choices are unconscious, based purely on the conscience instilled in us by our upbringing – whether good or bad.

Many great leaders had miserable, poverty stricken and abusive childhoods, yet they rose to prominence despite, or was it because of their poor start?  When one is so low that there is nothing left to lose, many have thrown down the gauntlet and aimed for the top – knowing any progress at all is a step off the bottom rung of the ladder.  Look at the likes of Cardinal Jaime Sin of the Philippines, Archbishop Desmond Tutu and the recently deceased Nelson Mandela of South Africa.  These men grew up through an era of incredible racial hatred and vilification in nations divided by race – between different warring tribes, by colour, between blacks, whites and other coloureds and cultures, and by wealth and poverty levels.  It is a melting pot from which you could not imagine any winners but these men shone through and created legacies that affected not only their own families and country, but the global communities as well!

#Empowerment for men

The Kennedy Brothers
Image from http://www.pbs.org

Some great leaders were born into the roles, such as the Kennedy brothers.  Wealth and power were their birthright.  However, it was the birthright of other men also who abused it and became monsters.  The Kennedy brothers created a legacy that has become mythical; they virtually created a royalty class in the republic of the USA.

How can the average guy, like you and me, gain empowerment for men?

It’s not hard, but it requires conscious effort if it is not already in evidence.  It requires us to be aware of these distinctions and consciously choose humility and service, it requires putting our leadership out there on offer, and it requires action to follow through.

Not all of this is going to come naturally, especially the part about it being a ‘state of mind’.  We need to stand guard at the gateways to our minds, to ensure that what we feed our minds is healthy.  We need to remind ourselves constantly, daily, that we are not here to harvest, but to plant the seeds that will become the harvest.  We do this by creating within ourselves the desire to become more, and better at being ourselves.

#Empowerment for men

Catch, Dad!
m.inmagine.com

For a father, be a better, more considerate parent, who takes time to parent his children.  This can be as simple as reading bedtime stories to your babies and toddlers, changing their diapers when they need it, cuddling them and kissing them goodnight.  As they grow, it means teaching them to play ball in the park – not because you want them to be a champion ball player, but because it’s fun for them and it teaches them to run and enjoy life and grow fit and healthy.  It gives them hand/eye coordination and a sense of achievement when they catch the ball.  When they get to school, attend the school plays, the sporting events, the parent and teacher meetings, show an interest so that when they enter their challenging teen years, you are already an important part of their life to them, and you don’t have to fight to get your message heard.  You already have their trust and love and now when they need you, they will trust you enough to come to you for guidance and help – not just cash!

For a husband, be thoughtful and considerate.  Study what it takes to be a better partner, lover, friend and

#Empowerment for men

Date night!
Image from blamebilly.com

confidante.  Earn the trust of your wife, encourage her to feel a sense of achievement in her life and be proud of her, the amazing woman who was incredible enough at some time in your life, to win your heart and accept you with all your faults.  Share the workload with her.  That doesn’t mean offering to wash the dishes and breaking them all and creating more work!  No, contribute what you do best, whatever that is, to take the load from her.  That will definitely mean diapers, taxi driving kids to sports events and sharing the discipline roles.  And be a great lover – one who takes her on date nights, surprises her with flowers and gifts, and sometimes leaves a lovely card around for her to find and show her you really do think lovely thoughts of her all through the day.

As a community member, stand up and be counted when it counts.  Wallflowers get nothing and give nothing, community leaders are in the middle and up the front, looking first to the betterment of conditions for their family, through making their community better.

Elected leaders take an oath of office, but less live it than take it.  However, genuine leaders are already living way beyond any oath that could be taken.  The oath that is sworn is the minimum expectation of the elected official – the true leader is always going the extra mile!

How will you know if you have gained this elusive ‘empowerment for men’?

You will look around you and see the evidence.  Success leaves clues, but so does failures.  Look at the faces and in the hearts of the people around you and you will know if empowerment for men has been your way.  Your people will admire, respect, love and follow you to hell and back.  It is either empowerment for men and everyone around you, or you became a dictator and have a group of “yes men” or servants – you can’t have it both ways.  The evidence will be there.  If you can’t find the evidence, just check to see if you are a wallflower, still waiting to make your contribution to the world.

On a personal level, how can you gain empowerment for men?

Empowerment for men and in fact, anyone, is best done through a structured program that puts you on a course that teaches you the self-discipline and self development necessary to change your life.  No, it’s not hard – just constant, and being human, we can forget.  We can slip up and before you know it, a month has gone by and you realise you haven’t set or checked off a goal, made an affirmation, or acknowledged a lesson from a day passing.  A simple program, a few minutes morning and evening is all it takes to reshape your thinking and feelings to empower you to make new, better and conscious decisions about your life and the people you care about.  That program could be Life Change 90.

I wrote about this recently in a post called EMPOWERMENT and it’s worth a revisit, to review the EMPOWERMENT TONE SCALE.  As you work on your daily self development program, you will see that you are continually moving your emotional and mental state up to empowerment, from where you can change your world and the world and lives of those around you.

Worth considering.  Empowerment for men and any guy who wants to become one!

If you feel this blog has provided empowerment for men, women and their families, please reblog it and share it with other men and families around you.  The world needs empowerment for men to lead it out of the morass of apathy, violence and destruction we seem to be plagued with.  Only empowered people will have the strength of leadership necessary to take us forward.  Perhaps you will be the one who puts this in front of such a person and makes the difference.

Til next time, fair winds and full sails,

Ray Jamieson

“The power to change your life lies in the simplest of steps.”
Steve Maraboli

Please refer also to my other posts on Empowerment:

Financial Empowerment

Empowerment

Empowerment for Women

Empowerment for Teens

Empowerment for Children

Personal Empowerment

What would an empowered man do?

Next Year

NEXT YEAR

#Next Year

Image from http://www.wunderground.com
A new beginning

“Although no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.” Carl Bard

How was your last year?

For most people, about this time of the year, thinking about last year is pretty much the focal point of their inner reflections.

What will make next year different?

Only 2 things can or ever will make a difference in your life, its outcomes and your achievements from year to year:

  1. The things you read, study and take into your heart and mind
  2. The people you meet and allow to have an effect on you

(Paraphrased from Charlie Tremendous Jones)

What Charlie meant was that unless we do something different, such as allow ourselves to learn something new so we can do something new, only then can something different happen to us!  If you are riding on rails like a tram, the destination is already pre-arranged!  #Next year will be the same!

What can you do to ensure that positive change happens next year?

I have two recommendations only; two blog posts for you to read at these links, and then to act upon:

  1. Self development – why bother?
  2. Why systemize personal development?

Why bother with Self Development for Next Year?

If you didn’t like what last year brought, it’s time to make some changes.  For things to change outside, first they need to change INSIDE!  To HAVE something different, we need to BECOME something different!

Why systemize Self Development for Next Year?

Systems work!  You think you are a free spirit, but you are totally systemized in everything that works perfectly.

You eat something, it goes into your digestive system.

You think, choose to move a muscle, and it works through your nervous system.

You book a flight or a hotel room, it goes into the reservations system.

You post a letter, it goes into the postal system… Hey, not EVERY system is perfect every time, but you get the idea – systems work, because they deliver a result, pretty much every time.  If you realise you need some personal development, when you systemize it, you’ll find it works better too.  That can eliminate the ‘losing track’ or ‘forgetting to do it’ problems most people find when working on their personal development.

#Next Year

Take Action!
Image from http://www.modularhomecoach.com

Once you have read these two blogs, don’t just sit there – take action!  Plug into a ready-made system that is waiting to help you make the changes you want in your life.  Dial them in and turn up in your life each day – the system will take care of it from there.

It needn’t be hard work.  After all, you were going to wake up and have a day each morning, weren’t you?  This will just make it flow better and give you something to be pleased with at the end of each day, and put a spring in your step at the start of each day.

My wish is that you DO have a much better next year.  This is how you can do it!

If you feel this has been valuable to you, please share or reblog it for others to enjoy and gain from also.  Everyone deserves the chance to make their next year better than their last!

Til next time, fair winds and full sails!

Ray Jamieson

“Failure is the opportunity to begin again more intelligently.”Henry Ford