TO BE LOVED
“Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind,
And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.”
― William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night’s Dream
#To be loved is the stuff of the ages, the poets of old and the stories they told.
To be loved by a puppy is cute, then they grow into those mischievous brutes
To be loved by a child is a joy to cherish, til they hit teens and then they vanish
To be loved by an audience is great for the ego, but they go home at the end of the show
To be loved by a nation, as president or dictator, an election or uprising and it’s “see you later!”
To be loved by a fiancée is sweet and delicious, to make it to the altar is so very precious
To be loved by your spouse years down the track, is a feeling to cherish to eternity and back
I am so blessed. I have known most of these – although I’m not aiming for president, but I can now honestly say that I am blessed to know that the lady I fell in love with and am now even more in love with, is still greatly enamoured with me. She has known me for some years now, knows my considerable flaws, knows that at times I drive her nuts, I forget things, I probably keep her awake at night with my snoring, if not because of the worrying she does over the strife I get into, and yet, she loves me.
“You don’t love someone because they’re perfect, you love them in spite of the fact that they’re not.”
― Jodi Picoult, My Sister’s Keeper
How powerful and motivating is it to be loved?
The search for love through the ages has inspired acts ranging from incredible heroism to just as incredible acts of stupidity. However, the desire to be loved the way I am loved is inspirational, motivational and incredibly empowering. It is the true magic of the universe – of all the billions of people on this planet, I found the one with whom together forever is our reality.
There are many ways people can desire to be loved. The flirtatious and frivolous one night stands or casual flings. Sure, they may be fun for a time, but it’s like eating a packet of potato crisps – almost straight away, you feel hungry for something else. Compared to a proper meal, there is no satisfaction, no comparison – it’s just an appetizer.
Another way to be loved is to have control over another, to demand their love and affection. But demanding or commanding a person to love you denies them the opportunity to choose to love you and to express and to give love from the depths of their heart. How could you know if this was what they felt, or only what you demanded? It’s an ego trip by a heart very lacking in confidence and self-esteem, scared to take a chance on love when it is easier and safer to extort it.
A very popular way to be loved is to allow yourself to be a toy for others, to be subservient to their wishes. But how would you know if they loved you, or were merely using you as a convenience? Where is your security? When they finish with you, what then?
To be loved by someone needy is scary. Once their needs are fulfilled, what then? Or will they ever be fulfilled? And is it love for you, or fear from them that keeps them close? There is no long-term tenure or happiness there either!
To be loved by someone freely, someone who knows all about you and still chooses to love you, chooses to be with you and commit to you totally, regardless of the consequences, trusting that as a team you can face the future together, that is the love to desire, when you desire to be loved. This is the stuff of ages, known by the poets of old through the stories they told.
If this is not what you have in your life, sure, learn the tricks, learn what to say, read the books, get a puppy, but above all, become worthy of the love of the person you would desire to be loved by. Do your bit. Look in the mirror at your heart and soul. Is what you see what you would expect the love of your life to become excited over? Are you excited about you?
The first step is to fall in love with yourself – like who you are and be proud of what you have to offer. Become attractive on the inside and let it overflow to the world around you. People notice. People will want to be near you, not necessarily to fall in love with you, but because it’s a great feeling for them, like a warm fire on a cold evening. And somewhere amongst those people you may find the connection to the one you desire to be loved by.
Remember, they are just like you, another person, feeling alone, seeking to be loved by someone to love them down through the ages too. Treat them as you wish to be loved.
My wish for you is to feel the blessing that I feel each morning as I wake to greet my day, my life and my wife, and again each evening as I give thanks for the day I have had, and say “Goodnight” to the one I so love to wake up with each morning!
If you feel this has been valuable to you, please share or reblog it for others to enjoy and gain from also. Everyone deserves to be loved!
Til next time, fair winds and full sails!
“I’m selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best.”
― Marilyn Monroe
- Love. Thoughts. Everything. Him. (5to9musings.wordpress.com)